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Archive for the ‘Choices’ Category

Praise

In Choices, Encouragement, Poetry, Worship on July 30, 2009 at 2:38 pm

“And the ransomed of the Lord shall come to Zion with songs and everlasting joy upon their heads; they shall obtain joy and gladness, and sorrow and sighing shall flee away.” Isaiah 35:10

 We went to comfort, but came away comforted; such was the vigor of her faith– such was the beauty of her …

 Praise

 Her life was just one constant hymn of praise,
Though pain and suffering marked so many days.
                (I’ve never seen Christ’s spirit brighter shine! )
                Weakness chained her body, and confined
It to the limits of her little room;
But naught that life could do could e’er entomb
                Her fervent prayers, or quench her heartfelt praise.
 
God loved her! He sent Christ to take her hand
And give her Royal Escort to the promised land!
                But just before she left, He let her see
                And praise the matchless glories of eternity!
God grant to us in life’s remaining days
A double portion of her victory and praise,
                That when our “call” shall come, the parting hour
                Shall be, like hers, triumphant by Thy power!


For more of the poetry of my grandmother, visit the “Uplifted Eyes” page.

Also, please subscribe below for weekly updates on this site.

Only the Good Things?

In Choices, Devotions, God's Provision on July 28, 2009 at 3:27 pm

Written by A Prodigal, January 21, 2007


But he said to her, “You speak as any foolish woman would speak. Shall we receive the good at the hand of God, and not receive the bad?” In all this Job did not sin with his lips. - Job 2:10

Of course, we all love presents – the good things.  It’s just the way we’re built.   As basically and continually selfish creatures, our main goal in life is to avoid the bad and grasp the good.  This is natural and, to a point, socially acceptable.

Because of this selfish nature, we tend to view God as a cosmic Santa.  We crawl up into His lap and spill our list of wants and wishes.  And occasionally He grants us these requests - perhaps not in the magnitude we desire, but He grants them just the same.  Shelter, food, love of family and friends.  He protects and provides.

But there are times when not only do we not get our wish, but something awful, traumatizing and soulfully painful comes into our lives.  We baulk and complain to the Maker of the universe that our order wasn’t properly filled.

But, as the pastor of a dear friend stated recently, “If God gave us all we ever asked for, many of us would be destroyed by our own prayers.”  Instead, we must ask with Job, “Should we only take good things from God?”  And that “good” as defined by us and our very limited perspective.  We must trust our Creator that breathed life into us to give us what we need and not always what we want.  What parent has ignored the need for medicine in favor of the ice cream requested by the child?

As parents, we know better.  Shouldn’t we assign the same ability – at the very least – to God?


For more Ponderings, click here

The Land of Beginning Again

In Choices, Pastor Bill, Poetry, hope on June 11, 2009 at 3:47 pm

Scattered throughout the notes and writings of my dad was found this poem by Louise Fletcher. He quoted pieces of it during phones conversations. He inserted lines of it in correspondence. He used it in sermons and lectures.

And, of course, I know why….

He longed – as many of us do – to be able to retrace the years and redo the things he did wrong and enjoy more the precious things taken for granted. It seems a bit unfair that we are not able to realize the intrinsic value of the truly important things until it is too late.

Well, that’s not entirely true, for today my dad is in that land of beginning again. No heartaches, no tears. No broken relationships to be lamented. No regrets and failures. He’s there and I’m going for I, too, have my regrets.

One day, like all of us, we will come upon that Land all unawares – I wonder if we will be prepared…….


I wish that there were some wonderful place Called the Land of Beginning Again

Where all our mistakes and all our heartaches And all of our selfish grief

Could be dropped like a shabby old coat by the door And never be put on again.

 

I wish we could come on it all unaware Like the hunter who finds a lost trail

And I wish that the one whom our blindness has done The greatest injustice of all

Could be at the gates like an old friend that waits For the comrade he’s gladdest to hail. Read the rest here!!!

Preference

In Choices, Perseverance, Poetry on May 5, 2009 at 2:32 pm

“He that dwelleth in the secret place of the most High shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty.”  Psalms 91:1

Incline my heart continually toward Thee, O God.  May I seek Thy favor in every desire, and make only that which is of Thee my everlasting….

 Preference

 Let me not be rich in this world’s goods,
                But let me know a wealth of quiet woods
Where I may rest enthroned upon a log,
                And listen to the whisperings of God!

 Let me never feel the kiss of fame,
                Or swell with pride at popular acclaim;
For these are transient glories doomed to dust…
                But grant me please, instead, a child’s pure trust. 

Let me never know a life of ease,
                Sodden with the pelf of vanities;
But let me do some unobtrusive thing
                To soothe a hurt, or cause a heart to sing!


For more of the poetry of my grandmother, visit the “Uplifted Eyes” page.

Also, please subscribe below for weekly updates on this site.

The Way Out

In Choices, Devotions, Encouragement, God's Provision, Salvation, Thanksgiving, hope on April 10, 2009 at 2:49 pm

We all desire a way out – of our situations, of our heartaches, of the pain of life.  We search for ways to dull the pain, rectify the situations and mask the heartaches.  It’s only natural that we should do this.  Discomfort always brings on a desire for change.  It’s where the change is sought that is crucial.

I read this recently in an old Preachers’ Magazine of my dad’s.  It seemed appropriate and on point so I share it here:

“Philosophy says, ‘Think your way out.’ 

Pleasure says, ‘Drink your way out.’ 

Politics says, ‘Legislate your way out.’ 

Science says, ‘ Invent your way out.’ 

Militarism says, ‘Fight your way out.’ 

The Bible says, ‘Pray your way out,’ for Jesus says, ‘I AM the Way out.’”

Thank God He made a way of escape for us.  Praise His Dear Name.


For more Ponderings, click here

Questions

In Choices, Devotions, Doubt on April 1, 2009 at 12:25 pm

Written by A Prodigal on September 4, 2006.


We all have questions.  And questions are OK.

We ask why the baby had to be born with that defect.  Noah asked about the boat in the desert.

We ask about the death of a young husband and father.  David wondered how long he would have to live in the cave.

We ask about the pain the affair of a spouse caused.  Joseph questioned his prison sentence.

We ponder the tsunami waves that devastate whole nations.  The disciples were perplexed over the death of Jesus.

We question the tests we face and their length.  Jesus felt forsaken on the cross.

We all have questioned and nowhere in all of Scripture are questions condemned if asked in sincerity and earnest.

Habakkuk gives us an example.  He had questions.  He was appalled at the sad state of affairs in Judah.  Depravity, immorality, and idol worship ruled the day.  Habakkuk wanted to know what God was going to do about it.

And God answered.  The Babylonians were coming.

This answer only prompted another question – why use such a wicked, heathen people as the tool to judge Judah’s sin? Read on!!!!

Distracted

In Choices, Devotions, Encouragement, God's Provision, Perseverance, Prison on March 9, 2009 at 6:20 am

Written by A Prodigal on August 31, 2006.


Early this morning while in the midst of my quiet time with the Lord, an interrupting thought intruded.  About a coat, of all things – a coat recently lost to me.

It was a great coat.  Black and waist length.  Zip-out lining that doubled as a windbreaker.  Pockets everywhere and Velcro take-ups at the cuffs.  I loved that coat.  And it was taken away from me!

I can’t explain why that thought entered my mind as I was reading the end of Isaiah, but it did.  A beautiful coat lost forever.  But the coat is only the tip of the iceberg; for once the Enemy starts me down that particular road, other things cascade in my mind.  A motorcycle with the paint job I designed.  A brand new riding lawn mower – hardly used.  The beautiful acreage.

And not only material things, but my family, my church, my career.  Gone – all gone.  Taken from me for a stupid mistake.

But, in His faithfulness, as I’m careening down that wide highway of regret heading toward the only destination – depression – God provides a place to turn around.  As I open my daily devotional book to check out the thought for the day, the Scripture sears my mind: “Forgetting those things which are behind…”  And I realize how senseless it is for me to lament over those things.  They’re gone.  Worrying won’t restore them to me.  Fretting won’t bring them back.  Being depressed only ruins today – it does nothing to alter the past.

If I believe that my sins are forgiven and are lying somewhere at the bottom of His sea of forgetfulness – and I do…. 
If I believe He makes all things new – and I do…… 
If I believe that He who began a good work will be faithful to complete it – and I do….. 
Then all I must do is “reach forth unto those things which are ahead” and keep the ultimate prize in sight.

He can restore the lost things if He chooses but, regardless, I choose to press toward the mark.


For more Ponderings, click here

Back to Prison – Part I

In Choices, Confusion, Control, Deception, Deliverance, Doubt, Encouragement, God's Love, God's Provision, Jail, Paranoia, Peace, Perseverance, Prayer, Prison, Thanksgiving, Worship on March 6, 2009 at 6:31 am

We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed.  (II Corinthians 4:8-9)

 

Dejected?  Surely!

 

Confused?  Probably!

 

But doubting? Never!

 

Joseph maintained his faith and started over again. Those were days and weeks and months of idleness, made all the worse coming from his place of responsibility. His nights were consumed with wondering what was going to happen and why he had been removed from usefulness and productivity.  Surely he remembered the meals in Potiphar’s house (meals he had planned) as he ate the prison gruel.  Certainly, lying on the straw mat, he thought of the soft bed he so recently had had.  He probably asked God more than once why he was being punished when he had done nothing wrong.  And Potiphar’s wife?  How long before forgiveness replaced the resentment?

 

But he waited on and trusted in his God.  And God did not disappoint—God made him a success.  A successful inmate; now there is an apparent oxymoron.  But God caused the jailer to take notice of Joseph, and, before you know it, Joseph was running the jail! Read on here!

What Goes Around, Comes Around

In Blessings, Choices, Devotions, Encouragement, Genesis on February 10, 2009 at 4:58 pm

“But Laban said to him, “If you will allow me to say so, I have learned by divination that the LORD has blessed me because of you;”  Genesis 30:27

What goes around, comes around.  A trite little saying that is generally thrown out upon the realization that someone has gotten the best of us.  Whether in a business deal or a realtionship, in our opinion, those who do wrong by us deserve a revisitation of that wrong.  We may very well be either powerless to affect the situation or we simply choose not to resort to retaliation.  But our sense of fair play almost requires that the “comes around” follow the “going”.

And, trite though it may seem, this idea is Scriptural.  The reaping always….always….follows the sowing.  In some form or another, we harvest – sometimes unwillingly or unwittingly – the fruit of our actions.  Examples of this are seen throughout the Bible.

David sowed adultry and reaped heartache.  Solomon planted excess and reaped near insanity and loss of a kingdom.  Joseph’s brothers sowed murder and deception and reaped half a lifetime of guilt and remorse.  Jacob sowed trickery and deception only to reap in kind. Read on here!!

Judging

In Behavior Modification, Choices, God's Love, Poetry on February 8, 2009 at 2:38 pm

“With what judgment ye judge, ye shall be judged; and with what measure ye mete, it shall be measured to you again.” Matthew 7:2

 

“Judge” and “Grudge” are identical twins. They are usually seen together. We seldom judge critically those we really love. May the Lord deliver us from ….

 

Judging

We dare not, must not, judge our fellowman;

Our eyes see but the surface of his deeds.

‘Tis Christ’s prerogative–for He alone

Perceives the motive, and the heart’s deep needs.

 

With endless patience, like a warning bell,

He cautions us to love both friend and foe;

If we usurp His judgment, we shall merit HIS–

For grudges held are as toward Him, you know!

 

There is no healing in an unforgiving heart;

It’s fervent zeal, though seeming from above,

Is parched and barren–yes, a fruitless thing–

That none can cure but God, for “God is LOVE!”


For more of the poetry of my grandmother, visit the “Uplifted Eyes” page.

Also, please subscribe below for weekly updates on this site.

Dad – Part III

In Blessings, Choices, Deception, Deliverance, God's Provision, Perseverance, Prison, Thanksgiving on January 30, 2009 at 6:57 am

The next several years were spent wandering; moving from one treatment center to the next; one hospital to the next; borrowing money from family and friends with no ability to repay.

 

At one point he was sleeping under a bridge in Nashville.  Desperate, he called one of his few remaining friends—the pastor of the small Nazarene church in Danville, Virginia, we had attended during my high school days.  Rick drove all night, picked up my father and took him back to Danville.  He housed him, fed him, gave him work, and got him help.

 

His dark years were over.  He had finally reached the bottom and made the decision that nothing was worth going through that dark tunnel again.

 

As I write this, nineteen years later, my father has enjoyed those years; sober and helping others.  Now, all these years later, he is back in the ministry, preaching the gospel, exhorting people to turn to Christ and to let Him change their lives.

 

I hate the lost years.  I hate what I saw my mother go through trying to keep my brother and me clothed and fed.  I hate that I lost those years with my father. Read on here!!!

The Choice is Mine

In Choices, Devotions, Perseverance, Prison on January 19, 2009 at 7:50 am

Written January 10, 2007, from Cell 9B15 at West Tennessee State Penitentiary…..


“…do not be afraid, for I am with you…” Genesis 26:24b

I’m surrounded.  Every minute of every day it bombards me.  It slaps me in the face as the guards shake the door in the morning for count time.  I endure it as I await the breakfast line.  As school begins the officers’ attitudes are fraught with it.  The other inmates are consumed with it.  And usually even those with whom I talk on the phone allow it to invade their thoughts about their life.

So what do I do?  I can allow myself to be sweep away by the tidal wave of negativity.  I can allow my mind to stagnate in this sewer of idleness and apathy.  Or I can choose to buck the trend – fight the tide.

And so I choose.  No more negativity.  It’s so easy to be dragged down into that pit, seeing everything from the pessimistic side, always complaining and whining.  But not only is that an incredibly unattractive personality trait serving to alienate even the most loyal and stalwart allies, it diminishes God Who cares for us and provides and protects.  It comes back to being thankful in all circumstances.  Content and joyful because we know beyond the shadow of any doubt whatsoever that He has our very best interest at heart and all things will work together for our ultimate good.


For more Ponderings, click here

The Unchangeable

In Choices, Devotions, Worship on January 12, 2009 at 7:50 am

The LORD spoke to Moses, saying: Speak to the people of Israel, saying: You shall eat no fat of ox or sheep or goat. The fat of an animal that died or was torn by wild animals may be put to any other use, but you must not eat it. If any one of you eats the fat from an animal of which an offering by fire may be made to the LORD, you who eat it shall be cut off from your kin. You must not eat any blood whatever, either of bird or of animal, in any of your settlements. Any one of you who eats any blood shall be cut off from your kin.  Leviticus 7:22-27

There are some things you just don’t do.  Don’t ever wear your sandles in front of the burning bush – just ask Moses.  Don’t stretch out your hand to steady the Ark of the Covenant – consult with Uzzah.  Don’t beat the Miracle Mule – talk to Balak.  Don’t do it the way you think best, follow God’s instructions – try to find Nadab and Abihu, they will testify to that.

We’ve gotten a bit too relaxed when it comes to things of God.  I remember when my Dad would turn down invitations to Sunday lunch if the meal was to be in a restaurant.  There were certain clothes you just didn’t wear in the church and eating or drinking in the sanctuary was a bad thing. Read on….

Which Way?

In Choices, Devotions, Jesus' Words, New Year on January 3, 2009 at 11:17 pm

questionmarkWe were past it before our brains realized what we had seen.  “Was that really a….?”  We had to see it again to be sure.

And there was no easy way to get back to it.  We were leaving a friend’s house, turning onto an interstate overpass, traffic was relatively heavy and it was a mile or so before I could safely negotiate the U-turn and return to the scene.

But we returned to the site of the sighting and, sure enough, there it was – a question mark with a directional arrow below it.  It was as if it were directing all those on that road with any question whatsoever to follow the sign for the answers they sought. Read on here!!

The Last One

In Choices, Deliverance, Devotions, Exodus on December 29, 2008 at 12:22 pm

 “In this desert your bodies will fall – everyone of you twenty years old or more … Not one of you will enter the land…”  Numbers 14:29-30

I’m the last one.  And everyone knows it.  It might be my imagination – I don’t think so – but they’re all watching me, waiting.  To their credit they try to behave normally around me.  They speak to me, share with me, and even occasionally laugh with me.

But I know.  And they know I know.  They’re watching .  Because I’m the last one.  It’s always with me.

For instance, just yesterday, about an hour before we stopped for the night, the fiery cloud still leading up ahead, I stumbled and fell.  My sixty-one-year-old body was just worn out so I laid there for a minute or two.  It felt so good to be still.  Felt so good, in fact, that it took a minute for me to notice the silence.  All conversation had stopped.  No one was even moving.  It seemed as though the entire nation had braked to a stop and was holding its collective breath.  Waiting.

As I struggle to back to my feet, I noticed the sagging shoulders, the sudden down-turn of the eyes and the barely veiled disappointment all around.

I wish I was already dead – I wish I weren’t the last one.  And that thought never leaves me.  Each morning, as my eyes open and the awareness of making it through yet another night sinks in, as I bend down to tie on those same sandals (more of a struggle these days) and as I smooth the night’s wrinkles out of that same robe (not even threadbare on the elbows), I wish I weren’t the last one. Read on here!!

Misplaced Faith

In Choices, Devotions, Worship on December 21, 2008 at 8:38 pm

 We put our faith in the oddest things.  Of course, we don’t think them odd, or we, in our “infinite” wisdom, wouldn’t place our faith there.  But just because we don’t consider it odd doesn’t alter the fact that our altars rest in strange places.  Probably the most common is in the illusion of financial security, or, lacking money, the belief that if we could only gather a few bucks everything else would be fine.

But, despite it having been labeled the root of all evil, money gets a bad rap.  While it is certainly the most common culprit, there are altars in other strange places, too.

“One more degree and I’ll be educated enough.”

“If only I could marry that person, all would be perfect.”

People, often vile individuals, accomplishments, and things all are offered the faith of which only God is worthy.  And then we wonder why our lives are in such a mess – why our hearts are broken in pieces.  We wonder why satisfaction is so rare and why happiness and joy are so fleeting.

We’re not unique in this.  Consider the Israelites – the poster children of poor faith placement.  Possible examples abound but let’s pick one for the sake of brevity.  Yeah, one will suffice to make this point.

I Samuel 4 finds the Israelites in trouble – deep trouble.  At constant odds with their Philistine neighbors, our story opens to find the battle raging.  Prevailing Philistines.  Ignominious Israelites.  The victor and the vanquished.  Four thousand dead on the field.

So they asked a familiar question – one each of us has repeatedly asked – “Why?” Read on here!

Perspective

In Choices, Devotions, Encouragement, Perseverance on November 3, 2008 at 4:50 pm
“All hope was gone…” –Acts 27:20

             The situation had gone from bad to worse.  I’m sure all the sailors, to a man, wished they had stayed to Fair Havens, as undesirable as that prospect had been at the time of their departure.  Their present circumstances made Fair Havens look like paradise.  But all the wishing in the world wasn’t going to change the consequences of that decision.

            Even the good doctor, Luke, seemed to share in the despair.  He reports that the storm raged for “many days…until at last all hope was gone.” (Acts 27:20)

Have you ever been in such a situation?  Are you there now?  Has another’s actions, or inaction, placed you in a precarious predicament?  That’s what happened here – the decision of a few adversely affected the many and now all hope was gone.  They were ready to abandon ship and give up the fight.

Is that where you are today?  Have so many days passed during your crisis that you’ve given up any hope of rescue or relief?  Is all you see, in every direction, high waves and dark clouds?  Are you ready to jump ship and give up? Read on here!!

Past Experience Determines Future Actions

In Choices, Doubt, Fear, God's Provision on October 29, 2008 at 5:20 pm

It’s part of the human condition.  Unless there is a mental defect that causes us to ignore what has gone before, the things we experience tend to affect future decisions and actions.  We don’t touch the red-hot burner because we’ve been burned before.  We don’t speed through a certain stretch of road for we’ve been stopped there before.  We don’t take that deduction due to the audit it caused before.

And this is the way it should be – the way God intended that it should be.  The learning curve – while longer in some – is God’s way of teaching us the important lessons of life so we can avoid the pitfalls that have the potential to harm us.

But it’s interesting (at least to me) that, while we can remember not to clip that toenail too short (ouch!) or take that big swig of steaming coffee (ouch again!) or stick our tongue on the frozen flag pole (duh!), we don’t remember the faithfulness of God in the past when we’re faced with new challenges.  We are all poster children for forgetfulness and we all seem as geese and wake up in a brand new world every day, forgetting how He made a way through those deserts in our past.  We haughtily scoff at the poor children of Israel when we see them repeatedly turn from God at the advent of every new trial while we do exactly the same thing in our day to day living.

Just once I would like to be able to face down a trial and the potential for depression and despondency by pointing back to His faithfulness and deliverance and sustaining grace that have not just punctuated, but have characterized my life, especially of late.  If I stop to think about it, He has provided in such wondrous and miraculous ways through out my life.  He has protected me and the ones I love even as I was doing my best to destroy all I should have held most dear.  He was carried me through the deep waters and the long nights and has placed me in a place of safety and met all my needs when I probably deserve it the least of anyone I know.

And yet, just as the Israelite whose sandels were still dusty from the floor of the Red Sea voices his desire to return to bondage, I seem to face each new situation with dread and fear.

When will we learn?  When will I learn that He is able and willing so handle every situation and provide for every need according to His riches?  When will I realize once and for all that nothing surprises Him or catches Him off guard?  When will it sink in that He never thinks, “Man, I didn’t see that one coming!”?

Ouch and Duh.  Maybe next time………..


For more Ponderings, click here.

Fellowship with Him

In Blessings, Choices, Poetry, Temptation on October 26, 2008 at 2:51 pm

“And have no fellowship with the unfruitful works of darkness.”

Ephesians 5: 11

 

The questionable thing is often the last stronghold of the enemy in our souls. It may be a matter of our very survival to continue to nurture its….

 

Fellowship With Him

 

“No fellowship,” dear God–not just with sin–

But all that bears not fruit for Thee alone;

How easy just to drift until we’ve grown

                Shallow, lean, and cold, and Christ within

                Is grieved with our divided love for Him!

 

How tempting now to choose the fruitless way,

The “pleasures of the world” within our gates;

The thing that’s maybe good, but satiates

                Our thinking ’til the best has fled away!

                (You warned us, God, to ever watch and pray!)

 

Thy fruit is goodness, truth, and righteousness,

Which leaves us no excuse in choice to err;

Lord, let not compromise become the subtle snare

                That robs us of the knowledge Thou dost bless-

                Outside Thy will, there is no peace or rest!


For more of the poetry of my grandmother, visit the “Uplifted Eyes” page.

Render Unto Caesar

In Choices, Devotions, God's Love, Jesus' Words, Love, Prayer on October 6, 2008 at 6:51 pm

“This reply completely amazed them.” –Mark 12:17b

 

The day began as all the others had begun.  Before the earth He had created rotated so that the sun He created cast its light on His temporary home, He was awake.  He was praying.

This day was precious.  This day was full of promise.  This day was one of too few days.  Too few to accomplish all He wanted to accomplish.  One thousand days wasn’t enough.  In some respects – from some perspectives – that number can be daunting, seemingly endless, but His mission was vital and He felt the pressure of the brevity of His time here.

Today the sick would be brought to Him for healing.  The hungry would receive food – for both body and soul.  And there would be the questions.

He didn’t mind the questions.  In fact, He relished them, invited them, enjoyed them.  They revealed the hunger of those He came to save.  They exposed the naiveté of a nation and the lostness of an entire generation.  Teaching these lost lambs about the Kingdom of His Father was His mission, so He loved the questions.

Well, He loved most of the questions.  But today would be one of the days when Satan would send his emissaries to try and trip Him up.  Hypocrites – the religious leaders – would endeavor to discredit Him in front of those poor lost lambs.  They would attempt to cast the seeds of doubt about Him and His mission into the fertile minds of His people.

So this morning He prays to His Father for the answer to the questions – to be ready when the enemy attacked.

And then it happened.

“Now tell us – is it right to pay taxes to the Roman government or not?  Should we pay them or should we not?” (Mark 12:14b-15)

It would have been one thing had this been an innocent question.  It would have been one thing had this not touched on such a political powder-keg of that day.  But as the question was asked the crowd held its collective breath.  You could almost hear their thoughts, “Oh brother, here we go.”

But Jesus just looked at them.   For a very long minute He looked at them.  Their eyes couldn’t hold His gaze.  They knew He saw through them to their motives.  Feet shuffled and throats were nervously cleared.

And His heart broke.  He loved them – hated the sin but loved the sinner.  They were His children – lost, but His.

So He answered their question with a question, “Whose picture and title are stamped on [the coin].”

“Caesar’s,” they replied.

“Well, then, give to Caesar what belongs to him.  But everything that belongs to God must be given to God.”

As we read this account, our minds should immediately jump to the next test – another attempt to trap our Lord.  We should remember the greatest commandment as explained by Jesus, “Love the Lord with all your heart, and all your soul and all your mind.”

Why were the hearers that day so amazed by this answer?  I’m amazed by their amazement.  How can we help but render – present – these things to God.  After all, He made them.  In His own image He made them.  His image is stamped all over them.

It was He who made our heart to beat in its wondrous and perfect rhythm.  It was He who made us just a little lower than the angels but worlds above the rest of creation with an eternal soul.  It was He who lit the first fire between the synapses in our brains and placed within us a will and a conscience.

He made us.  He breathed life into us.  He numbered our hairs and knew us before we were conceived.  He allowed us to make our own decisions which took us away from Him and brought death and pain into our lives.

And then He died for us.  He died to redeem us to Himself.

How can we help but render ourselves a living sacrifice unto Him?


For more Ponderings, click here.

August 13, 2001 (Part 4 of 4)

In Choices, Encouragement, God's Love, Love, Mail Call, Perseverance, Prison on October 2, 2008 at 3:19 pm

Son, you’re like Moses on the backside of the desert.  You’re in boot camp – you’re in school.  God’s getting you ready for a new work and a new life!

St. Paul wrote his greatest epistles while in prison.  Not a mountain retreat, but a dungeon.

And don’t forget God know how to get His servants out of prison, if He has to shake it down.  That is, if it’s His will.

Jonah disobeyed God and wound up in the stomach of a fish.  God got him out and he set out to accomplish God’s original plan and purpose.

Everything depends on what your plan and purpose is.  If it is to respond to the heart-cry of suffering men, women and children, it is God’s will that they be rescued and saved.

God can only use those who are broken through suffering.  “Even the Son of God learned obedience through the things which He suffered”, and “through suffering Christ became the Captain of our Salvation.”

Peter writes, “After you have suffered a while…make you perfect and establish and settle you.”

God has His own way of getting us fit for service.  “A vessel unto honor, sanctified and meet for the Master’s use.”

As for the pastor and people there, I’m sure they struggle with the matter of loyalties.  Your wife and the boys are the victims and they are reaching out to them which is what they should be doing.  I’m sure pastor and people feel that to show you interest and attention would be an act of disloyalty to your wife and the boys.  This is not right!

You are a victim, too!  A victim of Satan’s scheme.  The word is clear, “If any of you be overtaken in a fault (weakness – sin) ye which are spiritual restore such an one in a spirit of meekness – considering thyself lest thou also be tempted.”  Galatians 6:1.  It goes on to say, “Bear ye one another’s burdens and so fulfill to law of Christ.”  Galatians 6:2.

I, too, ran into this.  While in Nashville trying to recover, I went to a gathering at TNC when Chuck Milhuff was speaking there.  I walked up to a group of ministers, many I had know and worked with.  Twice I went to these men and put out my hand.  They turned and walked away.

Not all are like this, thank god.  Dr. Greathouse, John Andrus (Chattanooga First), Carl Sherman (Papaw’s buddy) and other, have stayed in touch with love and understanding.

As for your marriage, you must know that is over.  She is pushing for the “max” out of fear for herself and the boys.  You must pray for grace to put that family on God’s back burner.

I mentioned several pages back about the 12 steps and the 12 promises.  The first promise is this: We will know a new freedom and a new happiness. 

The second one is tougher to swallow: We will not regret the past not wish to shut the door on it.

This was the big one for me!  I choked on this, and raised the roof about it in many AA meeting.  I would say, “How am I not supposed to regret shattering the hearts of a wonderful wife and sons as well as hundreds of church people who believed in me?”  I really stormed at them until an old-timer with 25 or more years in recovery said, “Bill, everything you lost is what it took to get you where you are today.  It took what it took!  You can feel sad for the hurt you caused others, but don’t regret the price you paid to get straight and sane in your thinking!!”  Then he said, “Don’t shut the door on your past, leave that door ajar – just a crack – because God might just bring back some of those things or people when God feels you are ready for it.”

These are difficult words to digest but so true.  He said, “You leave the door open a crack for another reason.  You will remember people you hurt or things you did that you need to apologize for and set records straight.”

We sang the words for years, “Whatever it takes…”  The main thing is that we are under the Blood and ready for Heaven, and that we are serving Him until He calls us.  It’s hard for us to see God’s “Big Picture” of things.

I’ll pick up on this in another letter.  This is getting long and it’s getting late.  I have gotten your letters and appreciate hearing from you.

I love you and pray daily.

Always,

Your Dad

P.S. Remember….

F  alse
E  vidence
A  ppearing                “FEAR is the ‘dark room’ where all our negatives are developed.”
R  eal

                                                Pretty good, huh?

 

P.P.S.  So glad you are reading and praying!


For more of the Prodigal’s Mail, click here.

August 13, 2001 (Part 3 of 4)

In Behavior Modification, Choices, Deliverance, Encouragement, Mail Call, Perseverance on September 24, 2008 at 5:18 pm

I know your own pain is so intense and unbearable that it’s hard to imagine anyone else hurting, too – this is natural – all I could think of was, “My God, I’ve made a mess of everything and I have lost my family, my ministry, my life!!”  All the while your poor mother was dying by degrees.  You boys were dying.  Pastors and laymen over the nation were praying for me and dying.  Be patient.

Where was I?  I had a thought going and lost it when your letter came –

Oh, yes….O. J. Simpson’s wife, Nicole, who was murdered, has a sister who was so shattered by Nicole’s death that she has started a national program for battered women.  I see her on the news programs often.

John Walsh, whose son was kidnapped and murdered was nearly destroyed himself through that terrible experience.  It was at this time that he went to D. C. and all the major news networks and got permission and funding to start the broadcast “America’s Most Wanted” which has run for 16 years and has been the means of apprehending hundreds of criminals and sex offenders.

All that to say this: you have to fight the thing that nearly destroyed you, or it will overtake you and finish the job.

They say, “The best defense is a good offense.”

Nothing reinforces your own recovery and reduces the risk of relapse like active involvement in a program to help others with the same problem.  And Son, it’s everywhere. 

MSNBC, as well as many other networks, is carrying one program after another about “Sex for Sale” which has flooded the country and the world, now reaching little children through the Web until little children are making copies of nude people and exchanging them with each other at school!  The accessibility of the computer sex market has flooded the country until it has reached epidemic proportions.

A congressional committee has or is meeting in D.C. to discuss this real problem (I saw this on C-Span).  They had video machines set up and were reviewing some of the material that our children have access to.  Porn is linked with most major crime in the U.S. and other countries.  It’s powerful and pervasive.  It’s obsessive and addictive.

Something to think about in view of your own precious boys – as well as other scores of children just like yours: nothing builds trust with the ones you’ve injured like taking an active role in combating the problem.

Had I not become active in helping alcoholics and addicts the 5 years at Hope Harbor and another 4 years in charge of the out-patient program at the hospital, I doubt I would be alive today.  Hundreds went through those programs that were helped and many have held out and are in recovery and many in church with their families.  My dream was to make this old house a recovery center or an intermediate care facility for people getting out of treatment centers for 30 days with nowhere to go except back to the old “playgrounds and playmates” which leads them back into relapse.

But I have had no money and by the time I got the place partially restored my health had begun to fail.  But it’s OK today.

The 8th of next month will be 11 unbroken years I have been free one day at a time from the addiction that destroyed my ministry, my marriage and nearly my life!


For more of the Prodigal’s Mail, click here.

Read Part 2 of this letter…

Read Part 4 of this letter…..

Turn The Light Back On

In Behavior Modification, Choices, Control, Devotions, John on September 22, 2008 at 3:32 pm

In the beginning, “God said, ‘Let there be light.’  And there was light.”  (Genesis 1:3)  And this light was the essence of God shared with the world.  It was not the created sun.  Check the record.  The sun wasn’t spoken into existence until day four.  This light was God Himself.  This was the light John wrote of at the very beginning of his gospel.  “In Him was life, and that life was the light of men.” It was the inextinguishable, incomprehensible, inexplicable radiance from the pure personality of the Creator.

And He shared this part of Himself with a dark world.  “The people walking in darkness have seen a great light.”  (Isa. 9:2)

But then God did the most amazing thing.  Something more amazing than creation.  More wonderful and frightening than anything ever done before or since.  Something that surely left all Heaven in stunned silence.

The Creator gave the created the light switch.

And the created used it to turn off the light.

Light makes us uncomfortable, doesn’t it?  Darkness hides the dust on the furniture, the dog hair on the rug, the wrinkles on the skin and the mess we’ve made of our lives.  Get it dark enough and even the sink full of dishes and the heartaches and heartbreaks can seem to disappear.

We turn the lights down in our homes and in our souls.  We think things, plan things and indulge in things in the dark we would never contemplate if the light was on.  The Great Deceiver has convinced us that, like the two year old with his eyes closed, if we can’t see God, He can’t see us.  Satan whispers that one night of drunken rivalry won’t hurt anything or anyone – besides, haven’t we earned the right to a little fun?  One act of adultery or fornication won’t matter.  After all, it’s a God-given human urge, isn’t it?  One pill or one joint is alright.  It’s just to numb this pain.

So we hit the switch.  We turn God’s light off.  We move around with darkness in our souls thinking we’re having fun and living the good life.  We spend money we don’t have to hang out with people we don’t really like and try to numb the pain which will only return.  We live this pretend life when there could be so much more.

Yeah, turning on the light will be painful initially.  Shocking.  Look at the mess we’ve been calling life.  Discouraging.  Is there really a fulfilling life possible?  Cleaning house after avoiding it for a while is no fun.  Even less fun is the piercing light of God’s presence illuminating all the recesses of our souls so long in the dark.

Reality check.  God handed us the switch, but it was a loan and not a transfer of ownership.

One day our switch will be deactivated and God will turn on the light once and for all.  And on that day the garbage piled up over the years will be displayed.

Wouldn’t it be better to use the switch, face the initial pain and invite Jesus in for a field day?

“Behold, I stand at the door and knock.”  And, while we may be embarrassed about the mess, He knows about it already and just really wants to help clean up.

Bright light can be initially painful to those coming out of the darkness, but light cleanses, heals and gives life.

What will you do with your switch?


For more Ponderings, click here.

August 13, 2001 (Part 2 of 4)

In Behavior Modification, Choices, Deliverance, Encouragement, Jail, Mail Call, Prison on September 17, 2008 at 4:51 pm

Dr. Willingham wrote, “God learned something new in human suffering when He stepped down on the battlefield of human suffering and sorrow.”

It was because of this the writer of Hebrews spoke of Christ, the High Priest who, “is touched by feeling of our infirmities, and who is acquainted with our grief.”

There is an understanding through identification once we have experienced the pain!  Only those who have been there are qualified to share!

It was Betty Ford who, after disgracing her office as First Lady through her alcoholic addiction, later confessed that she had to “step down” in surrender which included cleaning toilets and scrubbing floors on her hands and knees.  It was there she heard the cry of those, like herself, trapped in addiction.

She faced another day and the crowds of people, among which were her family, President Ford and their children…..  In a touching ceremony, she placed her foot on a golden shovel, and turned the first shovel of soil for the construction of the Betty Ford Clinic, where thousands of actors, politicians and congressmen and women have completed successful recovery from alcohol and drugs.

Charles Colson disgraced, indicted and sentenced to Federal prison for his involvement in the Watergate scandal finally heard the cry of suffering inmates and started prayer groups with them.  When released he organized the nationally known Prison Ministry, and Chuck has traveled for years speaking in churches and prisons and has written books that have gone around the world touching and blessing thousands.

*****Just got your letter of August 8th and have had a crying time and prayed and agonized for you.

Yes, Son, I am with you all way!  I understand your loneliness and the scorn you feel.  I know.

You mentioned your brother.  Not only is he neck deep in that business, as well as trying to be attentive to your boys and your wife, he has told me he has made a number of trips up to visit with you and the slot was taken by your girlfriend.  You have not mentioned her to me, but I can understand how you would hold on to her.  I’ve been there on that one, too.  They would come to the treatment centers and hospitals where I would be confined and visit with them and bring me things, etc.  I didn’t care that much about them but I felt they were all I had!  So I would hold on.  It was like a man floundering out in the ocean and reaching out to hold onto anybody or anything!  I held on to a lot of driftwood trying to stay afloat  - then when I would get to shore and collect my wits I would realize they were the last people I wanted to be with.  By that time they had run up my credit cards, etc.  (One Sears bill for $1000 for tires and shocks that took me a year or more to pay off.)

But if there is true meaning to the relationship and you really love her, then do it right.  Pray together and when you get out, marry her, and move to Little Rock or Jackson, TN, and start a new life together.  But I sure wouldn’t slap this in the faces of the family in Memphis.  They need freedom and you do, too…time to heal.

Call your brother and ask him to come and see you.  He can tell you what is going on with the business and your family.  You need him.  He loves you and is deeply indebted to you for all you have meant to him and done for him over the years.  But he does not have a good attitude about your girlfriend.  He feels she played a part in your downfall.  This is only natural for him to feel this way.  I understand, but he doesn’t.  He has never been “there” and hope he doesn’t get there.

But you need to stay close whatever you have to do.  You must realize that for the people that love you there is a “love/anger” stage they are going through.  You boys did it with me.  “If Dad loved us why did he leave mother and take off and leave us?”  Andy said his anger caused him to go on the ramble just like I did.  We vent our anger in different ways.

Your brother loves you but he’s hurting badly.  Only you can help this by being patient.


For more of the Prodigal’s Mail, click here.

Stop Looking Around

In Behavior Modification, Choices, Devotions, Jesus' Words, Matthew, Prayer, Prison on September 8, 2008 at 6:53 am

But when he started looking around at the wind and waves, he became frightened and, beginning to sink, he called out, “Lord, save me!” – Matthew 14:30

            Stupid.  Humans are stupid.  “Stupid is as stupid does,” says the actor, and that just about sums it up.  After all, stupidity isn’t dependent on intelligence.  It is revealed by the actions we take – the decisions we make – in spite of our intelligence.

            Or maybe that isn’t it at all.  Perhaps we’re just cursed with short memories.  Like the children of Israel, we forget the things God did yesterday.  Our problems of the present wash away our memory of the miracles of our Savior.

            In Matthew 14, we find our Lord, early in His ministry, being struck by tremendous grief.  The disciples had all been appointed but it was early.  The news came that cousin John had been beheaded.

            Jesus needed time to be alone – to grieve – but the crowds were relentless.  They followed and clamored after Him.

            And He had compassion on them.  He talked to them.  He healed them.  He fed them.  (Do you think the disciples ever realized the significance of the twelve baskets of leftovers?)

Finally, the day ends.  The disciples are sent across the lake.  Jesus is alone with His Father and His thoughts.

And the storm came.

So, in spite of His fatigue – in spite of His grief – He starts across the lake to find His men.

And find them He does.  Still digesting the miraculous leftovers, they are consumed with fear and panic over their circumstances.  The waves and wind have extinguished the glow of the sublime.  The rain and thunder have distracted them.

And when impetuous Peter does focus on the Lord long enough to take his two or three heaven-empowered steps, the world around him bombards his senses and changes his focus again.  From the Son to the seas.  From the miraculous to the mundane.  From the Christ to the circumstances.  From the eternal to the immediate.

            Once again, just when Peter was about to go under, he cried out to Jesus to save him.  Again.

And He did.  Again.

Maybe it’s pain.  Not stupidity or short memories, but pain.  We don’t learn lessons in life until the pain becomes so intense it breaks us.

For a child, one touch of a hot burner teaches an unforgettable lesson.  Instruction, counseling and the experience of others are simply not effective.  But the personal pain encountered when flesh starts to burn does it.

For some a prison sentence will do it.  For others it does not.

For Peter it was the post-denial pain followed by the gleam of forgiveness found in the eyes of the Savior during an early-morning sea-side breakfast.

            What will it take for you?

Stop looking around.  You’ve found the One.


For more Ponderings, click here.

Trading Burdens

In Choices, Devotions, God's Provision, Jesus' Words on September 1, 2008 at 10:10 am

Come to me, all you that are weary and are carrying heavy burdens, and I will give you rest.  Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me; for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.  For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.  Matthew 11:28

            I have never worn a yoke.  Obviously.  And I don’t know anyone who has.  But I’ve seen them used and I know how they work.

I know if they are not fitted properly damage will be caused – serious damage.  The yoke must be made for the animal.  A yoke is not a “one-size-fits-all” device.

I have carried – and am carrying – burdens I was not designed to carry.  The evidence is there in plain sight.  Sores where there should be none.  Ugly scars, rubbed places, even some wounds that simply refuse to heal.  Without some lightening of the load, I will eventually die broken and scarred.

I remember an old episode of “Star Trek”.  Part of the original series – not one of these new imitations.  In this particular episode, the noble crew of the Enterprise encountered a being from another world who had a very special gift.  She could, by a simple touch, transfer any injury, whether external or internal, from the afflicted one to herself.  Then, as you watched, the injury would repair itself.

Amazing.  Miraculous.  “Interesting” was Spock’s word.

            But there was a problem.  The use of this gift drained the being to the point that, late in the show, she died, unable to heal herself.  She had limitations and those limitations were revealed as we watched.

            Stephen King later wrote “The Green Mile”, which dealt with the same theme.

But isn’t it funny how most good stories were told first by God?

Take this one, for example.  I know a being who can do exactly what this fictional character did in the show.  He takes my wounds on himself.  My pain becomes His pain.  My failures become His.

The regrets and failures of the past are taken.  In their place is forgiveness.

The pain and confusion and stress of the present are taken.  In their place is understanding and strength for the day.

The anxiety and worry of the future is taken.  In their place is peace.

Why do we insist on struggling so?  Why do we refuse to enter into this incredible deal being offered to us by our Savior?  Why do we insist on wearing this yoke that was not fitted to us and carry the load we were never intended to carry?

He is waiting.  The offer is on the table.  It’s been there for a long time – our whole life – but many of us refuse to close the deal.  We refuse even when the upside is so huge and the downside is non-existent.

Regrets, failures, pain, confusion, stress, anxiety and worry.

Forgiveness, understanding, strength, peace.

What’s your choice?  You have to decide – not deciding is in itself a choice.

            And the really good news is that, unlike the being from “Star Trek”, or the big hero of “The Green Mile”, the One who wants so desperately to trade burdens with us will never grow tired.  He is the eternal One and is certainly more than able to handle anything we could possibly be dealing with.

Come on.  Make the deal.  Make the trade.  Watch your wounds heal and your scars fade.

The choice is yours.  What will you do with His offer?


For more Ponderings, click here.

A Danville Connection – A Word from the Heart

In Choices, Encouragement, God's Love on August 21, 2008 at 8:51 am

A dear friend recently made contact through my Web Site.  Apart for decades and completely out of touch, she is overwhelmed by the story of my life laid out here.

But her words are redemptive, encouraging and eloquent – I hope she will forgive my sharing them with you.  They are too wonderful to pass up……..


I have read every chapter you have written here and many of the blogs, letters and other information that you have posted. It will take some time for me to actually process it all more fully. It almost reads like a story of some distant character to me, and yet, I know this is you too. I am sure it has been both painful and therapeutic to cleanse yourself like this.

I knew you long ago, and in that confusing time of growing adolescence surrounded by parents and other adults who were finding their own ways while directing us, I choose to believe I at least knew a part of you. Just as you knew a part of me. Very rarely do we reveal ourselves completely to  others…especially while we are trying to determine who we are really…but I think we learn over time how to be authentic, with our imperfections and everything, rather than keeping them to ourselves and living in the constant torment that you describe here. I know some people keep up appearances all their lives and never release the hidden things to anyone. I am happy that you are to the point where you are dealing with these monsters — slaying them one by one. I do believe in deliverance! I do believe that we have to die daily to our flesh and walk in the spirit — it is not always an easy task. I do believe God can and will bring healing to your life — no matter what we have done, thought, acted upon, etc… He is faithful and just to forgive us, when we repent and turn from it. Keep doing that. I believe we have to renew our mind daily, thinking on what is pure, honest, just, of a good report, etc… and always bring our thoughts into captivity. Satan wants that idle ground to work with in each of us.

I am a little sad that you have no recollection of those goofy times at church camp, Alleluia choir, IMPACT Team, etc. and how much trust my own father had in you that he allowed me, his only daughter, to ride with you alone as we embarked to Colorado. All the girls I knew had big crushes on you. You may recall I seemed to have a ship in every port on that trip; that would prove to be evidence of something deeper lacking in my own life as time progressed (we all have our own demons to battle, flesh to die to, etc. and that is another story).

Your family was a big inspiration to my family and to the church. I value having those times in my life. I have some very warm memories of those Nazarene church days, even though life has taught us that things weren’t perfect. People turned out to be other than what we had thought or even expected, and yet, the message of God’s love, forgiveness, mercy and grace abides. It was the message, and not just the messengers.

I study the Bible and take an honest look at the people whom God uses — we make them saints — they aren’t so much that way in the Bible really. They are followers, but at times they too fall short and/or struggle. Life is messy, even under the best of circumstances. We are of this world remember, but He has overcome it. We need Him so that we can do the same.

You are telling your story…a testimony of restoration. I know that God is a God of restoration (restoring the years that the cankerworm has eaten — Joel 2:25). He has done it in my life. And continues to do so.

It is heart-wrenching to hear all the things you have gone through…the struggles, the despair, the dark times, the disappointments, and the sins that have gripped you in your life. But it is heart-warming to hear that you have returned home to your Father and that you are allowing God to use all those things for His purpose that the enemy meant to destroy you. That is what we must do I believe.

It is the enemy, Satan, who comes to steal, kill and destroy, but God can and does take what Satan meant for evil and turn it around for His Good. I could tell you the dark roads that I have traveled down, but that is for another time. Just know this — repentance brings us back to Him.

I applaud you for facing the things you have faced and continue to face and for writing about your journey, and I pray that you continue to be authentic with yourself, God and others. I could recite verse after verse and preach that stuff all day to you, but I know that you have that knowledge.

I believe we need more than knowledge; we need a heart for God. We need to take His Words and His Ways into our hearts, and focus our minds on those things that He has for us. I am not saying that it is easy — even with the strongest Christian relationship and firm support all around us. The enemy sets traps at every turn; he has strategies; he drags us onto the battlefield. We need to be prepared — put on the armor of God. Remember that Satan can only suggest it to us — we have the right to say “no” to him and his wickedness. We have the right to refuse the demons that come to us — no matter what they are.

I thank God that His grace is sufficient…but we get overwhelmed because we think about tomorrow and this and that and on and on. It’s just for today…right now…because really, that is all we have. Yesterday is gone and tomorrow is not promised — we only have this moment — and He sustains us in it. I am so thankful to hear your story and know that the “prodigal” has returned. I rejoice with the angels and your Father!

Please keep in touch.

I love you always

Tragedy

In Choices, Devotions, Encouragement, Forgiveness, God's Love, Samuel on August 4, 2008 at 3:29 pm

“He does not sweep away the lives of those He cares about.” – 2 Samuel 14:14

 

Tragedy had invaded Israel – even as far as the king’s own household.  A story pulled right out of today’s headlines – one of lust, incest, deceit, rape and murder.  And, finally, to complete the horror, an excommunicated son – the king’s beloved Absalom.  Banished for defending the honor of his sister.  In hiding to avoid his own death which the law demanded.

But, thankfully, this story has a happy ending.  And so does ours.  This story shows the depth and breadth of our Father’s love.  And the healing of this relationship between this father and son resulted from the devotion of a general and the acting ability of a woman.

Joab knew “how much the king longed to see Absalom.” (2 Sam. 14:1)  Maybe some hurt in his own life made him sensitive to this pain in the life of his king.  Perhaps it was simply his incredible sense of duty.

But whatever prompted him, Joab devised and implemented the plan to cause the king to realize just how dire the situation was and how easily it could be fixed.

We are not even told her name, but we are told of her reputation for great wisdom.  She plays her part perfectly, drawing the king to empathize with her before turning the tables on him.

Read the story.  Listen to her words as she instructs her king.  See the scene as, finally, the son is reunited with the father.

And realize the implications this story has for all of us as you read the woman’s words in verse 14.

“All of us must die eventually.  Our lives are like water spilled out on the ground, which cannot be gathered up again.  That is why God tries to bring us back when we have been separated from him.  He does not sweep away the lives of those he cares about – and neither should you!” (2 Sam. 14:14)

Scripture says that we have all sinned and fallen short.  This is probably more true of me than you.  But the beautiful fact remains that God, our Heavenly Father, while our sin demands excommunication and banishment, is standing, right where we left Him, arms outstretched, beckoning us to come to Him.  To come back to Him.

You see, He never moved.  It was our sin that separated us.  And it is our own guilt that keeps us away, causing us to feel we have to clean ourselves up before we will again be acceptable.

What a fallacy!  The prodigal son was embraced by the arms of his father before his shower – fresh off the road and just out of the pig-pen.

How much more will the creator embrace us – just as we are – if we will only relent, submit and obey Him.

Don’t punish yourself over past failures.  Don’t remain a foreign land due to your sense of self-imposed guilt.

God loves you!  That is why [He] tries to bring us back when we have been separated from Him.  He does not sweep away the lives of those He cares about…”


For more Ponderings, click here.

More Than Enough

In Blessings, Choices, Devotions, God's Provision, Kings on July 29, 2008 at 2:16 pm

            I know how it happens. It happened to me in my days before prison.  What once was good enough suddenly isn’t anymore.  The big TV is dwarfed by the really big one in the store.  The SUV that was just fine is not as big as the one in the magazine ad.  The walls of the adequate house start to close in.

The magnificent becomes mundane.  The wondrous turns worrisome.  The fabulous fades to inadequate.

It happened to a woman living in Zarapath.  The famine had reduced her resources to alarming levels.  In fact, by the time Elijah came along after his days living by the brook, she had already resigned herself to the horrible death from starvation for both her and her son.

Imagine how she must have felt – the sharp pang of the reminder of her fate – as Elijah requested something to eat.  Feel her embarrassment at having to admit what she must have perceived as her failure to adequately provide for her son.

            And her amazement at the miracle as day after day the dry flask produced oil and the empty flour sack yielded what she knew to be absent.

Now I won’t presume to speak for you, but that would have been enough for me.

Or would it have?

            That surely would have convinced me of Elijah’s standing with God and of the awesome power of the Lord.

Or would it have?

Well, you know the story.  Her son died, she blames Elijah, Elijah restores his life by the power of God and then…then she exclaims, “Now I know for sure that you are a man of God, and that the Lord truly speaks through you.” (I Kings 17:24)

Don’t be too hard on the poor old widow.  It happens to us all.  What once amazed us, bores us.  What once awed us and was given the designation of a miracle of God, loses it’s punch after it has been experienced for a while.

The job for which we prayed so long is taken for granted, or even despised, as we long for the next.  The financial blessings of yesterday are forgotten in the face of new crises.  The deliverance from that horrible situation dulls as we seek yet another deliverance.

Let’s not be this way.  Let’s not forget God’s provision we are enjoying this moment.  Let’s not let the miracles of yesterday be forgotten in light of today’s challenges.

            The God of yesterday is big enough for today and all of our tomorrows.  He sees.  He cares.  Praise Him for what He’s already done and wait patiently on His timing for the next miracle.

            He knows what you need.


For more Ponderings, click here.

Exiled

In Choices, Devotions, Encouragement, Judges, Perseverance on July 16, 2008 at 6:13 am

“…..until the Exile.”

            Micah was a scoundrel.  And he appeared to get away with it.

            He stole silver from his mother.  When confronted and questioned about it he confessed and returned it.

            Mom was so impressed that she melted some of the silver and made an idol for the home.  An object of worship.

            So successful was Micah at ignoring God with apparent impunity that he formed his own temple and even hired a passing Levite as a priest.  Religion for sale.  Morals for sale.  A god at bargain basement prices.

            Who needs God?  He had an object of worship, a temple, a priest.  What a deal, right?

            Everything was going along just fine until a bunch of Danites came through and decided they wanted this laid back, free-style form of religion.

            The Levite, having already prostituted himself to Micah, found it a small step to move on to a higher bidder.  The Danites stole the silver idol from Micah’s house and stole a town from the Sidonians and set up shop.

            How many times in the Book of Judges do we read the sad epitaph?  “In those days there was no king in Israel.  Everyone did what was right in their own eyes.”

            Does this sound at all familiar?  We’ve lied.  We’ve cheated.  We’ve misrepresented.  We’ve stolen.  We’ve killed – maybe not physically, but certainly figuratively.  We’ve replaced God with something or someone else.  We’ve created our own religion.  We’ve sought out and found a religion or a church that preaches a “gospel” that is so watered down – diluted – that it doesn’t offend us. 

We commit character assassination.  We lust in our hearts.  We secretly covet what our neighbor has.  We harbor grudges and ill-will in our hearts.

Don’t we remember that murder and gossip are the same in God’s eyes?

            Or maybe you’ve changed your ways, repented and turned your life around and wonder why those around you, still going on their merry way, are seemingly immune from the trials and tribulations with which you are dealing and struggling.

            Are you so very tired of watching others skate through life trouble free while you are so troubled?  Financially set while you are financially strapped?  Relationally happy while you feel relationally challenged?  

            My advice?  Hold on!

            Believe me, I can understand your frustration.  I know how it feels to try to pray when the heavens feel like brass.  I’ve experienced days and weeks – even months – without any apparent move by God on any situation about which I was concerned.

            But, if you are reconciled with God, while “in this life you will have struggles” and while the struggles are sometimes debilitating, we can have the blessed assurance that our God will never leave us or forsake us.  His anger with us over the past is so short-lived and His lovingkindness reaches beyond the stars.  Weeping may last for the night, but joy – blessed joy – comes in the morning.

            Hold on!  Don’t lose hope.  Do not release your grip on Him.

            And when you’re tempted to just give up because of the seeming injustice you see around you, remember the story of Micah.

            Everything rocked along just fine…..”until the Exile.”


For more Ponderings, click here.

In the Dark of the Night

In Choices, Devotions, Fear, Jesus' Words, Salvation on July 4, 2008 at 8:11 am

Darkness had settled over the earth.  Creatures of the night were creeping and those ashamed of their actions were lurking in the shadows hoping to avoid detection.  That’s when he sought Him.

            As families were gathering in from the day’s activities and responsibilities and the lamps were being lit all over town, he ventured out.    What a time to search out the Light of the world.

            So under cover of darkness, hoping to escape discovery by those with whom he associated, Nicodemas sought out Jesus.

            He had questions.  So he sought Him out.

            Now, before we begin to criticize poor old Nic too much, consider a couple of things.

            He did seek Him.  Have you sought Him?  Really sought after God and the things He cares about?

            He recognized that there was something very different about this Man.  Something in his heart stirred and a long slumbering hunger awoke within him.

            He used his God-given intellect to question Jesus in order to gain some understanding of these wonders of which Jesus spoke.

            Do you think God gets His feelings hurt when we question Him and wonder about the things that He allows to come into our lives?

            No!  I believe that God invites us to come to Him.  He wants – longs for – a relationship with us.  We shouldn’t doubt or allow our questions to negatively affect our faith and trust, but just as earthly parents long for conversation – even questions – from their children, God deeply desires conversation with us.  He wants us to see His heart.

            But we come back to old Nic.  The saddest part of the story is what we not told.  We never hear of old Nic again.  What did he do with the answers Jesus gave him that night?

            What have you done with the light that the Light of the world has revealed to you?

            Coming to Christ by night is quite alright by Him.  As long as you come – as long as you seek Him out.

            But then what?  Are you still ashamed of Him?  Do you allow others to see and experience the change he as brought to pass in your life?

            If not, was there ever truly a change?

            Jesus taught that a person doesn’t light a lamp and then hide the light.  The light is intended to be a blessing to all those in the house.

            And it gets worse.  If we refuse to acknowledge Him in front of men – if we are ashamed of Him here on earth – He will refuse to acknowledge us at the time of the most important appointment we’ll ever have.

            What are you doing with Jesus?  Do you only serve Him in the dark of the night, or are you allowing His light to shine through you and bless those around you?

            Allow your experience with Him to come out of the shadows and into the light so others may see the wonders that He has and will perform in your life.


For more Ponderings, click here.

Broken Things

In Choices, Encouragement, Poetry, Prayer on June 28, 2008 at 3:25 pm

“Thou shalt remember all the way which the Lord, thy God, led thee… to humble thee and to prove thee, to know what was in thine heart.” Deuteronomy 8:2

 The way up is the way down; the way to the throne is the way of the cross. God’s love shines brightest in the….

Broken Things

God uses best the broken things:

                The contrite heart, the folded wings

                                Of our poor, selfish pride–

                                Ah yes, and even scars we hide

                He blesses for His own!
 
 If in the breaking I might be

                A better vessel, Lord, for thee

                                Then crush my stubborn will,

                                And all of “self” that lingers still;

                Anoint my eyes that I may see

A vision of Thy plan for me

                Til Thou shalt call me Home!


For more of the poetry of my grandmother, visit the “Uplifted Eyes” page.

Come Into His Presence

In Choices, Devotions, Prayer, Worship on June 23, 2008 at 6:24 am

It was always so difficult for the Israelites to get into God’s presence.  Only through the priest, and even then, after so many steps required so he would be ceremoniously clean.  Such a bloody, expensive, complicated ordeal, yet for centuries they performed these sacrifices to obtain forgiveness for sin and to return to God that which He had claimed to be His own.

It makes me ashamed to admit that I have so often failed to come into His presence – whether with my praise or my petitions.  It’s so easy for us today.  No washing.  No killing of animals.  No burning of incense.  No special clothing.  Just us.  With a humble heart and open mind. With praise on our lips and a song of adoration in our souls.

Whether we’re depressed, scared or annoyed, He wants us – expects us – to come into His presence.  Not through some intermediary. Us.  Just us.

How can we not come to him.  He came to make the way easy.  He came for us.


A Morning Prayer

In Choices, Control, God's Provision, Prison on June 16, 2008 at 10:49 am

 This is not original.  This was heard by this Prodigal through the tape ministry of the College Church of the Nazarene, in Olathe, Kansas.  This was played over and over as I sat in the cell of a State Penitentiary.

And the trust I so desparately needed then in that environment, I still need today almost eight months after my release.

Learning to lean on the Savior is not a once done, always have thing.  It is a daily choice and I need His help and His guidance.

Maybe this prayer of this godly man will help focus your prayer for trust as it did mine.


Heavenly Father, I ask Your forgiveness for the many times I have failed to live in perfect trust.  I confess that I often find myself anxious and fretting and worrying.  I pray today that you will teach me that You will give to me the grace to trust You more.  Not more as in quantity, but in quality.  May my trust be more deliberate. 

Give me the patience to wait through the times when it feels like nothing is happening.  Give me the courage to believe in the promises of Your word.  You have demonstrated Your faithfulness so many times in the past and yet sometimes my memory is so short. 

Remind me this morning to trust in You,

          to commit my way to you,

                    to delight in you,

                              to rest in you. 

Teach me and show me how, through the power of Your Spirit, to trust more perfectly.  I commit to You the unanswered questions and unsolved issues of my life, the frightening things that seem to wait out on the horizon of my life.  I offer them all to You this morning.  Help me to trust that You will see me through – that You will care for all that is involved in my life.

Blessed Be the Name of the Lord

In Blessings, Choices, Devotions, Doubt, God's Provision on June 9, 2008 at 2:28 pm

The words of Job are the shining example of trust in God.  Circumstances didn’t seem to matter.  His faith was not situational.  “Though He slay me, yet will I serve Him.”  Wow!  That’s amazing.

However, even despite his incredible faith, the humanness of the man had to have desperately sought and desired to know the reason behind the awful travail through which his family was asked to go.  Here was a man of God.  Prosperous, blessed and fortunate are all words that jump to mind as we read the beginning of his story.  And from all that we know, he deserved it.  A wonderful man, wholly and unreservedly committed to the Lord. Not the least uncertain from whom his bounty came.

Then disaster struck.  In the space of days his children were dead, his possessions lost and his wife gone.  And with failing health and with the ridicule of friends, he found himself homeless and alone.

But His faith never faltered.

How are you doing?

Abraham, journeying through the promised land, getting along in years, finally, as God had promised, has a precious little boy.  The boy through whom the promises of God were to be fulfilled.

Then came the day when his world fell apart.  “Sacrifice the boy to Me”, he heard God say.

“Why?” he cries.

“Trust Me,” is the only reply.

So up the mountain they go – just the two of them.  The father in him was surely dying inside.

The child in him chose to trust.

How are you doing?

Jephthat made a promise to God.  The battle was imminent and a promise was made.  From a father’s point of view – really, from anyone’s point of view – a terrible promise.

“Go before me into battle and, when I come home, the first thing out of the house will be sacrificed to You.”

Imagine the horror of seeing his daughter – his only daughter – bound out of the house, tambourine in hand, to greet her victorious father.

“Why?” he cried.

“Will you trust Me?” is the only reply.

As we read, we just know that an alternate sacrifice will be found to spare the girl.  After all, God did it for Abraham, why not for Jephthat?

You can read the story.  No alternate was provided.  The only daughter was killed.

How are you doing?

Are you in a situation you don’t understand?  Looking for – expecting – an answer from God?  A miracle of deliverance?

“Why?” you cry.

“Trust Me,” is His reply.

And you can.

Job said it.  “The Lord giveth and the Lord taketh away.”

That could be a fatalistic statement taken alone.  But the next phrase changes it to the most amazing evidence of faith ever expressed.

“Blessed be the name of the Lord.”

Is God worthy of your trust?  Of course He is.

Will you continue to trust even when the answers don’t come and the heavens are silent?

I hope so.  It’s the only way.

His ways are higher than our ways and His thoughts are higher than our thoughts.  Blessed be the Name of the Lord.


For more Ponderings, click here.

Choose to Run

In Behavior Modification, Choices, Control, Devotions, God's Love, Jail, Jeremiah, Perseverance, Prayer, Prison on June 4, 2008 at 9:36 am

For surely I know the plans I have for you, says the Lord, plans for your welfare and not for harm, to give you a future with hope.  Then when you call upon me and come and pray to me, I will hear you.  When you search for me, you will find me; if you seek me with all your heart.  I will let you find me, says the Lord, and I will restore your fortunes and gather you from all the nations and all the places where I have driven you, says the Lord, and I will bring you back to the place from which I sent you into exile.  Jeremiah 29:11-14

I have always been fascinated by people who have the discipline and ability to get out, day or night, hot or cold, rain or shine, and run.

Why do they do it?

Are they getting ready for a big race?  Probably not.

Are they preparing themselves so that IF they are ever accosted, they can sprint to safety without becoming too winded too quickly or without their legs tiring too fast?  That’s unlikely.

I’ve tried to develop this discipline.  Over the years I have spent untold hundreds of dollars on running shoes and clothes – like I needed some special “look” to run.

I joined track teams in both junior high and in college.  Both times I rationalized my decision to quit.  Justified it by telling myself that I was just not cut out to be a runner – I didn’t have the “stuff”.

Well, yesterday I did it again.  I stopped in and bought some new running shorts and short socks and I’m going to try it again.  Not because I’m afraid of or expecting an attack.  And not really because I want to lose the little paunch that I have developed over the years.  But because I want the discipline in my life.  I need the discipline in my life.

I have always been fascinated by people who have the drive to get out of bed an hour before they really have to, regardless of how late they were up the night before – although I expect that getting to bed at a reasonable hour is a part of the discipline, too – to pray and study and listen to God.

Why do they do it?

Do they think they are going to be engaged in some sort of intense spiritual battle that day?  They’d better, because that’s what happens – daily!  Satan is out there.  The Bible says he’s prowling around like a roaring lion seeking whom he may devour.  I have been devoured  When the spiritual battle came – and it always comes – I was out of shape.  I tired too quickly.  My spiritual legs gave out.

I never was much of a threat to Satan.  I never developed the discipline of prayer and study.  Oh, sure, when the big test was approaching and I hadn’t studied as I should have, or when the money was all gone and the twins needed food, or when the office payroll came due and the work was not there, or when I found myself in jail with very few friends and the bad news was hitting me from every direction, in those times I would be very disciplined, very conscientious, about my devotional life.

But I’ve never learned the trick of preparing for battle in times of peace, of staying prepared for the battle even when the threat board was empty.

Today I choose to prepare.  I choose to be disciplined.  I choose to let God control my life one hour at a time.  I choose to run and I choose to pray.

Jeremiah 29:11-14 is my promise.  I want to search for Him and His will for me with all my heart.  I want to get in on his plans to prosper me – not as the world perceives prosperity, but I want to be rich toward God and in what He has in store for me.


I wrote this while sitting at my brother’s house.  I wrote this thirteen days after my bail was posted and I regained some measure of freedom, tenuous though it was.  I wrote this the day before 9/11, never comtemplating the change the next day would effect in the psyche of our nation and the world.  I wrote this not realizing until later just how quickly everything that matters can change. 

Footballs & Blessings

In Blessings, Choices, Control, Devotions, Football, Jail, Jesus' Words, Prison on May 28, 2008 at 7:04 am

It’s a beautiful fall day.  Picture perfect even.

There is a little chill in the air.  Not much.  The climate here is always fairly mild, but a little chill is present, nevertheless.

And the excitement.  Oh, yes – excitement is there keeping the chill company.

The crowd is gathering in.  They know what to expect.  They’ve all seen it before – well, most of them have.

Two rich men are preparing to play the game.  Others have roles to play as well, but it’s the two rich men who are the center of attention.

And it’s not entirely accurate to call it a game, either.  It’s a serious business to the two rich men.  A game to some but not to them.

The two of them have been preparing for this day for a very long time.  A lifetime.  An eternity, some would say.  And they’re ready.

A hush falls on the crowd.  They all appreciate the importance of the next play.  It’s success or failure will have huge consequences.  The stakes are high and, regardless of the outcome, many people will be affected.

So here it goes….let’s listen in….

Tom:    This is it, folks.  It all comes down to this.

Chris:   You’re right, Tom.  It’s third down and fifteen from the Giant’s 29.  And, with only 25 seconds remaining, the Cowboys have got to get this first down and stop the clock in order to stay alive.

Tom:    Aikman is set.  He takes the snap and drops back into the pocket.  He’s looking downfield.  Here come the Giants.  Aikman fires.  Irving is in the end zone.

Chris:   O, my God.  Michael Irving never even looked back.  He turned at the corner of the end zone and the ball was right there.

Tom:    A picture perfect pass and a trademark finger-tip catch as Irving falls out of the end zone.

Chris:   The official is running down the sideline.  TOUCHDOWN!!!  The Cowboys have won.  The Cowboys have won the game.

Tom:    It just doesn’t get any better that that Aikman/Irving combination.

Chris:   You’re right, Tom.  That was a beautiful sight to see.

 

That game being over, you grab your remote and begin channel surfing.  Another scene grabs your attention.

It’s a beautiful fall day – well, it could have been fall..  A picture perfect day.

There is a little chill in the air.  Not much.  The climate here is always fairly mild, but a little chill is present, nevertheless.

And the excitement.  Oh, yes – excitement is there keeping the chill company.

The crowd is gathering in.  They know what to expect.  They’ve all seen it before – well, most of them have.

Two rich men are preparing to play a game.  Others have roles to play as well, but it’s the two rich men who are the center of attention on this day.  And this is definitely not a game, but there are rules that must be followed.

The two of them have been preparing for this day for a very long time.  A lifetime.  Some would say an eternity.

A hush falls on the crowd.  This is it.  The moment.  Most appreciate the importance of this play.  It’s success or failure will have eternal consequences.  The stakes are high and, regardless of the outcome, many people will be affected.

So here it goes….

Let’s listen in….

 

Rich Young Ruler:      Good Teacher, what must I do to inherit eternal life?

Jesus:   Why do you call me good?  No one is good – except God alone.  You know the commandments: ‘Do not commit adultery, do not murder, do not steal, do not give false testimony, honor your father and mother’.

Rich Young Ruler:      All of these I have kept since I was a boy.

Jesus:   You still lack one thing.  Sell everything you have and give to the poor, then you will have treasure in heaven.  Then come, follow Me.

 

Scripture reports that when he heard this he became very sad, because he was a man of great wealth.

 

You can almost hear the great cloud of witnesses gasp as the play fails.  How tragic.  How utterly tragic.

Aikman launched a ball.  Christ launched a blessing.

Irving followed his instructions.  The rich young ruler did not.

Irving turned the right way and caught the ball.  The rich young ruler missed the blessing by turning the wrong way.

Aikman connected with his receiver.  Christ was unable to connect due to the exercise of the free will God has given each of us.  The blessing was there but the intended receiver was not in the right place.

One took a risk, the other elected to play it safe.

Don’t we tend to do the same thing?  We go our own way and then ask God to bless us.  And when the blessings do not come as we think they should, we get mad at God.  Blame Him for our failures and our situations.

Don’t get mad at God – follow His route.  His planned path.

The blessings are there waiting – follow His leading.  His direction.

“In all thy ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct thy paths.”

Connect with Jesus – the consequences are eternal.


This thought was written while I was in the jail in Shelby County, Tennessee.  The date was December 15, 2002, and my effort to avoid prison by being granted probation had failed.  Things were dark but the Lord was there.

Blessed be the Name of the Lord!


For more Ponderings, click here.

Ruts

In Choices, Control, Forgiveness, God's Love on May 21, 2008 at 11:38 am

The sign on the side of the old dirt road was simply written and to the point.  It was a warning sign, but most likely placed there by a local and intended to lean away from the serious and toward the humorous.  It read “Be careful which rut you choose.  You’ll be in it for the next five miles.”

I smiled as I read the sign but soon found out, to my dismay, that the author of the warning knew what he was talking about.  The road, obviously susceptible to frequent flooding, was indeed but a series of deep ruts that stretched out lazily into the distance.  Some were deeper than other and most likely formed by the farm equipment used in the area.  Others were more shallow and kinder to the suspension of my car.  I took the advice offered on the sign, chose carefully and made it through with nothing but a stiff neck and a slightly battered hubcap to show for it.

For years afterward, it was nothing more than a cute story to relate to friends and family.  But my life has taken a turn, and with that turn, the humor of the sign and the cuteness of the story have turned more serious.

I have come to believe that life is but a series of ruts.  Few of us will ever live a life where every day is filled with adventure and excitement.  For the most part, our lives are predictable and, at times, even mundane. We educate ourselves.  We hire ourselves out for a wage.  We marry.  We raise children.  If reduced to it’s lowest common denominator, each of these are ruts we run in as life progresses.  Of course, this is not necessarily a bad thing.  All of the endeavors listed are admirable and worthy of our attention and commitment.  Deep fulfillment can be found in these ruts.

But there are other, less acceptable, ruts in which we seem to find ourselves sometimes – even ruts we make for ourselves and then regret later when it’s too late.  Poor decisions, impulse control problems, failure to properly discipline ourselves, and the unwillingness or the inability to control our appetites and wants can place us into deep ruts from which there is no escape.  Even the loving and kind and forgiving Heavenly Father will ofttimes allow the consequences of our actions to unfold upon us, even as He forgives and prepares our place with Him in the next life.  Decisions have consequences and those ruts can be long and relentless. 

Even the good ruts can become bothersome and a chore if we fail to maintain a vital and continual relationship with God.  Only He can give us the ability and the desire to love others when they are not very lovable and to deal with the circumstances of life in a positive and engaging way.  No marriage is a bed of roses and every child has the potential to cause a parent heartache.  Bosses can be a pain and the very normalcy of life can be taxing.  Without God, we just tread water, churning through the days.

Ultimately, our choices determine our ruts.  And our attitudes – the only thing over which we ever truly have control – determines whether we are miserable or joyful as we travel.  Joy can be found in the ruts of life.  Fulfillment can be found in the mundane.  Usefulness can be discovered again after failure.  God is the God of second chances and, for those that love Him and seek Him with their whole heart, He can use even the ruts of life to bring us all the good He has for us.

 

Helpless

In Behavior Modification, Choices, Deliverance, Devotions, God's Provision, Prison, Psalms on May 19, 2008 at 8:20 am

For not in my bow do I trust, nor can my sword save me.  But You have saved us from our foes, and have put to confusion those that hate us.  In God we have boasted continually, and we will give thanks to Your Name forever.  (Psalm 44:6-8

Rouse Yourself, why do You sleep, O Lord?  Awake, do not cast us off forever.  Why do You hide Your face?  Why do You forget our affliction and oppression?  For we sink down to the dust, our bodies cling to the ground.  Rise up, come to our help.  Redeem us for the sake of Your steadfast love.  (Psalm 44:23-26)

I have always been self-reliant, self-sufficient, a self-starter, self-this, self-that, self, self, self….

Do you see a pattern?

I knew about God, knew a lot about Jesus, claimed trust and faith in Him, paid my tithe, attended church, prayed over meals (probably more from a perceived need to set an example for my children than from any real desire to thank God), taught Sunday School Classes (in my own strength), led Church Boards (in my own wisdom).

God gave me talents, abilities and intelligence and I, in turn, took God off the throne of my heart and replaced Him with the very gifts He had given me.

But today I am in a place where my talent is unappreciated, my intelligence is of very little use and my abilities are unable to accomplish anything of much value.

Funny how quickly a self-based life can crumble and leave you on the bottom with no where to look but up.  No one to whom to look but God.

Today the words of the Psalmist have a new ring: “I do not trust in my bow, my sword does not bring me victory; but You give us victory over our enemies, You put our adversaries to shame.  In God we make our boast all day long…”

I am helpless.  Unable to accomplish anything but to place my faith in God.  He is mighty.  He is able.  He is the Deliverer.  He is my rock.  He is my salvation.

So I pray with the shepherd boy, “Awake, O Lord!…Rise up and help us; redeem us because of Your unfailing love.”


This was written during the early part of 2003 as I sat on a prison bunk awaiting the deliverance I thought would surely come just any moment.  But, while my situation has now improved dramatically, the overwhelming (and spiritually healthy) sense of helplessness still prompts me to daily cry out to God from Whom all blessings flow and Who is more than able to accomplish what concerns me (and you) today.

For more Ponderings, click here.

Pray On

In Choices, God's Love, Poetry, Prayer on May 18, 2008 at 4:29 pm

“Let us not be weary in well doing; for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not.” Galatians 6:9

In due season! As the long years drift by, what a temptation to doubt. Yet so often just at the next turn of the road is victory–children saved or rec1aimed–that parent redeemed– 0 let’s ….

Pray On

How often the enemy taunted my soul,
And whispered that prayer was in vain,
“You pray that your loved ones
Through Christ be made whole,
But they go on in sin just the same. “
Discouraged? 0, yes, yet not in despair,
There was still that last “knot in the rope,”
I believed God was faithful! He would answer prayer
When glory! He honored my hope!

0, I love Him supremely! My cup overflows–
How unworthy I am of His care;
But my faith has been strengthened
For three worlds must know
God is faithful! He does answer prayer!
So pray when you’re weary of praying – pray on -
Pray though prayer seems a futility;
Hold fast to God’s promises! He will respond!
Lo, the answers to prayer you will see!


For more of the poetry of my grandmother, visit the “Uplifted Eyes” page.

My Heart Is Fixed

In Blessings, Choices, Encouragement, God's Provision, Poetry, Prayer on May 16, 2008 at 8:15 am

“My heart is fixed.” Psalm 108:1

We are living in a day when bloodless cults are finding easy access to men everywhere around the earth, but….

My Heart Is Fixed

I would not change this walk of faith,
For one of groping doubt;
No creed or dogma could attract
That leaves my Saviour out.
No bloodless cross could set me free,
Or satisfy my soul–
It took the Fount of Calvary
To make this sinner whole!

I want for nothing, but His smile,
His grace to meet each day
With quietness and expectancy–
He answers when I pray!
My heart is fixed, my faith unmoved
By skeptic’s mocking jeer,
For Oh, His Presence is to me
A taste of Heaven here!


For more of the poetry of my grandmother, visit the “Uplifted Eyes” page.

Will God Change His Mind? – Part VI

In Behavior Modification, Choices, Control, Devotions, Forgiveness, God's Love, Prayer on April 28, 2008 at 12:35 pm

This completes this small series of articles.  These were written during the fall and winter of 2002 – a time when I really needed God to change His mind.

In hindsight, by which most things become abundantly clear, I am glad that He did not stay the punishment I deserved.  I would have been so much worse off if He had.

Of course, He knew that.

I pray that these have been helpful in some way.


Have you ever felt as though you were in the belly of a great fish?  I have!

Have you ever stopped to imagine what Jonah experienced while there?  For three days?  I have!

But as intriguing as it might be to run down the road of sights and sounds, smells and fears, uncertainty and apprehension, the most important question to consider is, “Why was he there in the first place?”

The answer boils all the way down to his willful violation of a known command of God.

God said, “Go!”

Jonah said, “No!”

Sound familiar?  It does to me.

God said, “No!”

I said, “Whatever!”

So, while I’m not in the belly of a great fish – a fact for which I’m thankful – I might as well be.  The cell in which I spend most of my time is about the size of the stomach cavity of a whale and smells just as bad.  Uncertainty and apprehension try to fill my days and would succeed if I didn’t purposefully choose to keep my focus fixed on God’s promises, His presence and His great love and mercy.

But I digress – we have another question to answer.  The answer is the very reason for Jonah’s flight.  Jonah knew the answer to our question.  (See Jonah 4:2)  He knew God was a God of love and mercy.  And Jonah hated Nineveh.  Hated them for their ethnicity.  Hated them for their apostasy and sinfulness.  Hated the knowledge that, if they repented of their sins in response to his preaching, God would withhold His judgment.

So, when God told him to go preach, he ran the other way.  But he didn’t get very far.  God has a way of giving us just enough rope with which we inevitably hang ourselves.

In due time, with a lot more trouble than was really necessary, the Ninevites received the message and, much to Jonah’s regret, repented.

And God changed His mind.  (See Jonah 3:10)

Are there judgments coming into your life that you would like to avoid?

Check your obedience quotient.

Read Joel 2:12-14.


For more Ponderings, click here.

Exchange

In Choices, Forgiveness, God's Love, Poetry on April 25, 2008 at 10:47 am

“Great peace have they which love thy law; and nothing shall offend them.”
Psalms 119:65

The days which seem without either accomplishment or compensation are those in which we go our self-centered way, failing to “seek first the Kingdom of Heaven, ” but the touch of God upon our souls makes an irrefutable….

Exchange

Praise God, this was no ordinary day;
For when I rose at dawn and knelt to pray,
I heard my Father whisper from above,
“I have loved thee with an everlasting love! “

Upon my Saviour’s bosom I found rest
That soothed my anguished soul, and I was blest
To know that, though the arm of flesh may fail,
My Father cares, and doeth all things well!

He spoke my name; the sorrow I had borne
Was lifted like the darkness yields to morn!
He took that load I’d carried, oh, so long,
And dropped into its place an angel’s song.


For more of the poetry of my grandmother, visit the “Uplifted Eyes” page.

Gratitude or Grumbling

In Blessings, Choices, Deliverance, Encouragement, God's Love, God's Provision, Jail, Prison, Thanksgiving on April 23, 2008 at 9:32 am

     I wondered how it would be.  As my out date from the Department of Corrections approached and my mind began to focus more and more on life after prison, I wondered how I would react to freedom and the accompanying stress.
     The possibilities were many, each with a blend of circumstance and dilemma, but they can all be reduced to two general categories: gratitude or grumbling.
     Would I be like Peter who, released once from the prison of brick and mortar and later from the prison of his failure, spend my life in grateful service to my God?  Or would I be more akin to the children of Egypt who weren’t out of sight good before they started in on poor Moses?
     Would I be thankful for the blessing of release and employ my God-given talents to help others – a modern-day Joseph?  Or, to pick on the poor Israelites again, would my attitude turn sour at the first setback, disappointment or difficulty?
     Well, on this day which marks the six month point of my post-prison life, I can answer that question.  Not that this is the only time this question will need to be addressed for there is a lot of life left if God allows it, but, as with the first one hundred days which was the subject of another article here, this milestone is a big one – if only to me – and I feel the need to report for the glory of God.
     My answer to the question of which side of that fence I am on is resoundingly gratitude!
     There have been – and will surely continue to be – challenges and trials as the readjustment continues.  There will probably always be a little financial stress.  There will surely always be times of loneliness for my children and the life that could have been had I not allowed the enemy of my soul to gain that foothold in my life.
     But I am, indeed, grateful.  As I stepped out of my little rented house in the country setting north of Nashville this morning at just after five to head to work, I couldn’t help but pause to give thanks for all He has done for me.  In the quiet, early morning moment, as the birds celebrated Spring and the sleepy community began to come to life, I was again humbled – as I have been many times over the past six months – by God’s love, His provision, and all that He has restored to this once-shattered life.
     I am very grateful.

Will God Change His Mind? – Part V

In Behavior Modification, Choices, Control, Deliverance, Devotions, God's Love on April 21, 2008 at 5:42 am

Amos was just a working stiff – a sheep breeder by profession – from the little village of Tekoa.  In his day the town was about ten miles south of Jerusalem, but it has long since been swallowed by the great city.

He was an average guy, doing his work, caring and providing for his family, worshipping the only wise God.  Well, maybe he was special after all.  There were very few of his contemporaries worshipping the way they should.  At least not in the northern kingdom of Israel.

So one sunny day, while dealing with the stresses of his daily work, he was interrupted – interrupted by God Himself – and told to go north to Bethal and prophesy against the northern kingdom.

Can you imagine his reaction? Read the rest of this entry »

Prevailing Prayer – Part II

In Choices, Pastor Bill on April 16, 2008 at 6:15 am

“The effectual fervent prayer of the righteous man availeth much.”  James 5:16

In the Garden of Gethsemane our Blessed Lord, at age thirty-three, was so physically and emotionally engaged in soul travail that His Father actually dispatched an angel to strengthen him!  Luke 22:44 states, “And being in agony He prayed more earnestly and His sweat was, as it were great drops of blood falling down to the ground.”

The cold, powerless worldly churches of today need to return to the prevailing, spirit-inspired praying of Apostolic days - the kind of prayer that will usher in a Last Days Revival that will turn church sanctuaries back into revival centers instead of banquet halls, theaters and rock concert arenas! Read the rest of this entry »

Will God Change His Mind – Part IV

In Choices, Control, Devotions, God's Provision, Prison on April 14, 2008 at 3:45 pm

I had a good life.  I had a good marriage, three beautiful little boys, a thriving law practice and an overall influential life.  Very active in church, both musically and administratively.  By all outward appearances I was at the top of my game.

But something was wrong.  Wrong on the inside.  The outward success had no foundation – no spiritual basis – no real relationship with God to hold up the massive structure being built on top. Read the rest of this entry »

Will God Change His Mind – Part III

In Choices, Control, Devotions, God's Love, Psalms, Samuel on April 8, 2008 at 3:52 pm

I am an old man now – my life, both the good days and the bad days, are behind me now.

I guess from that last statement you could gather that I regret my life – and while, it’s true, there are moments of my life that I deeply regret, most of it has been wondrous and even miraculous.

There have been days of wonder, sitting on the hillside basking in God’s creation.  There have been moments of intensity as God delivered me from the attacks of wild beasts and the threats of giants.

There have been moments of incredible embarrassment, as when Samuel skipped over all my older brothers and announced to everyone that I would be replacing Saul as the King of Israel.

But then there were the shameful moments in my life, the most glaring being centered on the lust of my flesh to which I succumbed and caused a national scandal.  Read the rest of this entry »

Come On In

In Choices, Covenant, Encouragement, Forgiveness, God's Love, God's Provision, Peace, Worship on April 1, 2008 at 6:25 am

     “These things we pray in the blessed name of our risen Lord, Jesus the Christ.  Amen.”

     The wizened old man looked up and smiled at the small group.  Diversity was the only commonality.  No, that’s not quite true.  Each face was radiant with a supernatural glow.  That, in addition to the diversity, made this little group truly intriguing.  But it was the leader I was most interested in.  He looked up, his eyes brimming with tears – not of sorrow, but of joy – and said, “Beloved, that will have to do for tonight.  We should not stay out too late these days.”

     Turning to a youngster sitting at his knee, he continued, “Marta, please blow out that candle before we open the door.”
     And with a puff from that small child, we were all cast into darkness.  I heard shuffling as those around me moved toward the door and departed.  I, however, was riveted.  I had to know more about what I’d just heard and seen.

     So I waited. Read the rest of this entry »

USS Laodicea – The Modern Day Church

In Choices, God's Provision, Holiness, Jesus' Words, Pastor Bill, Revelation, Second Coming on March 27, 2008 at 5:49 am

Last week FOX NEWS carried the story of the USS INTREPID, one of the mighty aircraft carriers of WWII and Korean War fame, getting stuck in the mud while being towed up the Hudson River.  The Intrepid was involved in many strategic battles and logged an outstanding combat record winning many battle citations and commendations.  For the past twenty-five years she has been a floating museum taking on board thousands of tourists and history buffs to take photos and to just look and remember the glory days of this magnificent floating fortress.

     I remember well, our ship, the heavy cruiser, USS PITTSBURG CA-72 operating alongside the INTREPID while serving together with taskforce 77 with the 7th Fleet during maneuvers in the Mediterranean Sea.  I remember seeing its massive flight deck filled with powerful jet interceptors constantly roaring off the catapults destined for far away objectives.  I remember the bristling guns and swirling radar units searching the heavens as well as the ocean floor for any signs of an enemy craft.  What a floating city with such destructive power waiting to be released on a second notice!  What reports of ‘victory at sea’ came from the INTREPID’S captain during those great battles.  But now, it’s unthinkable that this mighty ship is ‘STUCK IN THE MUD.’

     I THINK OF THE CHURCH Read the rest of this entry »

The Hidden Path

In Choices, Control, Devotions, Encouragement, God's Provision on March 25, 2008 at 6:02 am
“Your road led through the sea, Your pathway through the mighty waters – a pathway no one knew was there.” (Psalm 77:19)                

Have you ever actually stopped to consider the scene?  It’s mind-boggling! 

The four hundred or so members of Jacob’s family ended up, through an amazing set of circumstances, in Egypt.  Times were good – great, in fact.  Joseph was in charge.  No one in the entire country, except Pharaoh himself, had more power than this exiled former slave.  This ex-shepherd.  This ex-houseboy.  This ex-inmate.

This man of God!

But now, all these years later, that tiny band has grown and, by God’s mighty power displayed through His servant Moses, has escaped from Egypt.  That safe haven of the time of Joseph had turned cruel and harsh.  God heard.  God cared.  God provided the way.

So consider the scene: this over-sized family, that only hours before had made a joyous and triumphant exodus from the land of their captors, standing on the shore of the great sea, mountains on either side and the most fierce and feared army of the day bearing down from their rear.  I imagine the singing stopped.  I hear the panic in the voices of the women as they ask their husbands what’s to become of them.  I recognize a familiar chorus, one that will be, unfortunately, replayed many times in the coming years, “Did God deliver us from Pharaoh only to kill us in the wilderness?”

Can you blame them?  Would you have responded any differently? Read the rest of this entry »

Trust

In Behavior Modification, Choices, Devotions, Jesus' Words, Psalms on February 25, 2008 at 5:10 pm

It’s been said that there is a God-shaped void in the soul of every man that nothing will fill but God Himself.  But we humans are so self-reliant that we will search the world over to find a way to drive a square peg into that round hole in our souls.  Everything under the sun is tried.  We tend to place our trust in things that we can feel or experience.  Checkbooks, property, people and pleasures.

But in due time all those things will disappoint:
     Checkbooks dry up.
          Property deteriorates or is taken away.
               People fail and disappoint.
                    Pleasures are fleeting.
We find ourselves back where we started……searching.

Eventually we all come to the realization that only God can fill that hole in our hearts.  He made us and He created that space – nothing other than Him will satisfy.
The Psalmist knew it.  In the 62nd Psalm, he cautions his readers not to trust in strength, possessions, wealth or people.  “Together they are only a breath.”

“People, trust in God all the time.  Tell Him all your problems, because He is our protector.”
We must remember the words of our Savior, “In this world we will have trouble” but we must trust in the Lord.  “Do not lean upon your own understanding.”  Trust God!How?
     Forsake everything and everyone for Him alone.
          Cast all your anxiety on Him alone.
               Place your faith in Him alone.
For in Him is life and breath and being.  Real life, the breath of the Spirit, and being all you can for God.Until He returns.


For more Ponderings, click here.

God’s Confluence

In Blessings, Choices, Christmas, Coincidence, Control, Luck on February 25, 2008 at 4:54 pm

Do you believe in coincidence?  Luck?  Fate?  Kismet, Karma, Happenstance?

I don’t!!  God is in control and knows where we are and everything that concerns us at every moment of every day.  We are subject to His will and His way and His direction.  We can choose to yield to that will or we can spend years – or a lifetime – beating ourselves against that will.  Yielding brings peace and fulfillment.  Rebelling only causes pain and havoc here and an eternity without Him.  The choice is ours and I will have more to say about this in the days to come, but I would like to provide an example of how wonderfully God can and will work all things out for our good if we will only choose to follow Him.

On December 13th, I was informed by my boss at the church that, if the entire crew would work on Sunday, the 23rd, to get the facilities cleaned up from Exit 108the weekend services, we would be allowed to take the entire week of Christmas off.  There was no debate among the gang and it was settled.

And when we all discovered that the time off would be with pay, the excitement began to build and I, for one, since this would be the first Christmas outside a fence in five years, was anxious to spend the holiday in Memphis, with the possibility of seeing my children at some point during that week.

If that wasn’t enough of a blessing, God moved again.  This time in the heart and schedule of an ex-wife.

On Sunday, December 16th, I received a phone call from the mother of my boys.  She informed me that the family would be celebrating Christmas on the Eve of the day and, if I wanted and was willing to meet her halfway, I could have the boys – my precious sons – the week of Christmas!!!!

Needless to say, I DID want.  I DID meet her halfway – at Exit 108 on Interstate 40.  I DID have my sons in my home – for that’s what it is when they are there – for four glorious days and nights.

An entire week off from work – with pay – and then the boys get to come up, too?  Coincidence?  Do you really believe that?  How sad if you do.  My God is in control and orchestrated the whole thing.  Praise His dear Name.


Where God Wants Me is a poignant PowerPoint presentation dealing with the question of Coincidence.  I don’t believe in coincidence, as you have just read.  God is in control.  Enjoy this and think about it.

Grudges

In Behavior Modification, Choices, Devotions, Forgiveness, Jesus' Words, Peace on February 23, 2008 at 1:29 pm

“And when you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive him so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins.”  Mark 11:25

I’m sitting on my bunk.  It’s 5:15 AM.  The usual time for my prayer and devotional minutes with God to start the day.  A few of the other 29 men in the guild are up and moving.  Several TVs flicker their pictures on the dark walls.

As usual, there are many matters I bring to Him.  So many hurting people.  People that I have hurt and disappointed.  So I bring these petitions before my Father.  I know He is strong enough to bear the burden of my problems.  He loves to hear from me and longs to trade yokes with me.

As always, I pray that this prison experience will end quickly and that I can be reunited with those that I love.

Eventually prayer time ends and I pick up my Bible.  Today’s reading takes me to Mark 11.  Verse 24 is always so encouraging.  Read it!  Doesn’t it give you goose bumps?  Such a wonderful promise from the lips of our Lord.

But this morning, it’s verse 25 that demands my attention.

                “And when you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive him so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins.”

Smack!  It’s almost a physical blow.  There are grudges I’m holding onto.  Yeah, I have hurt people, but people have hurt me, too.  I have been justifying my ill-will towards some and simply flaunting my extreme irritation at the way some have turned their backs on me in my time of need.

And yet here was a scripture conditioning my forgiveness and the answers to my petitions upon the release of the very grudges I had nurtured and to which I felt so justified.

So I began to list them.  Names of people.  I was shocked at the length of the list.

But I got it all out and it felt good.

Now what?  Do I expect the guards to come and pack me up and send me home because I had a spiritual breakthrough?

To be honest?  Yeah, sort of.

But realistically, this is simply more of His refining process.  Release will come.  Right now my job is to become more like Him every day.

So learn from my experience.  Let go of your grudges.  They’re just dead weight anyway.


For more Ponderings, click here.

Throw Away A Bottle

In Behavior Modification, Choices, Prison on February 17, 2008 at 9:11 am

     I threw away a 20-ounce bottle today.  What’s the big deal, you ask? 
     If you think about it, you’ve probably done the same thing.  Not necessarily with a plastic bottle, but then I’m not really talking about the bottle.  I’m talking about the value we place on things in preference to the truly valuable things in our lives.
     But I’m ahead of myself.  I guess I need to tell you why the 20-ounce bottle got my attention on this 12th day of December.
     Plastic bottles are a valuable and much sought-after item inside the walls of a prison.  There is no other way to have a cold drink of tea after lock-down than to find a bottle, clean it out real good, and use it as a repository that can sit in your little cooler waiting for your thirst to build.  Without the bottle, the tea is hot and more ice is required – another scarce commodity.
     Others, of course, use the bottles for purposes outside the realm of the legitimate – the theft of milk from the chow hall or the storing of home-made whiskey – so the staff, the only ones with access to the plastic bottles, are supposed to ruin the bottles before throwing them away to prevent the inmates from gaining access to them.  Not all the staff is as conscientious as they are supposed to be and so, while scarce, the bottles are available.
     All that to say that as I dropped that bottle into the trash today – something I would have never even considered eight weeks ago – it struck me how odd it was that we attach such value to things.
     Inside it was bottles, clothes, or that pair of shoes that is unlike those of the other inmates – status symbols all.
     Out here the bottles and clothes and shoes are shoved to the side in preference to cars and houses and bank accounts and a million other insignificant things that we choose to place value upon to the exclusion and detriment of our friends, our families, and our God.
     It occurred to me today that we all might need to reevaluate things a little and maybe throw away a bottle or two. 

The Privilege of Worship

In Blessings, Choices, Peace, Prison, Thanksgiving, Worship on February 3, 2008 at 10:33 am

In the quiet moments before the service begins I pause to reflect. It was such a short time ago that I was prohibited from being in a setting such as this. Longing for the peace and calm of the sanctuary in the midst of the noise and confusion of the prison, I felt at times that this day would never arrive.

Yet here I am – in the Lord’s sanctuary – preparing for worship and I am so grateful.

But it doesn’t just happen, does it?. It requires effort and purpose. It can’t be accidental. It must be intentional. After a long week of work the thought of getting out early – especially on a cold a rainy day such as this – requires a certain level of commitment. But, oh, is it ever worth it…….

Here I am. So thankful. So joy-filled. So at peace with my life. And He gets the praise.

God Provides

In Choices, Control, Devotions, Doubt, Fear, Genesis, God's Provision on January 30, 2008 at 5:54 pm

Abraham said, “God himself will provide the lamb for a burnt offering, my son.”So Abraham called that place “The LORD will provide”
Genesis 22:8, 14a

     A scene in a movie always jumps to mind when I read this great story.  Indiana Jones is standing on the edge of a great and seemingly bottomless chasm.  He needs to cross this span to complete the journey on which he has embarked, but there seems to be no way.  At one point we think he’s going to try to jump it using his own strength – how he does most things in those movies.  But he realizes just how futile that attempt would be.  Ridiculous to think he could cross that distance.  He’d have to be Superman.
    
Finally he pauses for a moment and then quietly, if timidly, steps out on faith.  And just at the moment we all think he will plunge to his death, a bridge, hidden until that moment, appears to bear him across the distance.
     At the last minute.
     I can’t imagine the faith it took for Abraham to bind Isaac and lay him on that altar.
     How many times in our lives have we stood on the edge of a precipice, wondering how we would ever cross?  How many times have we contemplated our eternal predicament and fretted over how we would ever satisfy the Holy God with our puny little selves and our flawed and inadequate attempts?
    
How many times have I visualized myself in the place of Indy and wondered if my faith would be stout enough to tap into the limitless resources of my Heavenly Father.The bridge is already there.  The provision has already been made.
    
Truth produced and performed a song a number of years ago with the hook line of, “Step out and the bridge will appear.”  So true.  God wants – even demands – our faith and trust.  He’s standing there with the bridge in place waiting to see if we trust Him enough to step out when all we can see is the chasm.
    
“God, I trust in your faithfulness to change both my attitude and my circumstances.”


For more Ponderings, click here.

Fulfilled Promises

In Blessings, Choices, Devotions, Doubt, Genesis, God's Provision on January 22, 2008 at 3:53 pm

And he believed the LORD; and the LORD reckoned it to him as righteousness.
Genesis 15:6

God is unpredictable.  His ways are higher than our ways and His thoughts light years beyond our feeble capabilities.  So, with that in mind, it should not surprise us – it is the next logical conclusion – when promises He has made to us are not fulfilled in the way we expect them to be. 

But that head knowledge rarely translates into heart acceptance, does it?  And we plan it all out and become discouraged, disheartened and disgruntled when He doesn’t agree with us.

Choosing to believe God – to view Him as the ultimate promise-keeper – in spite of circumstances and failures and setbacks is the essence – the very definition of – faith.  Without faith no man shall see God is more than a promise dealing with eternity.  It is a promise that renews itself each and every morning.  Our faith allows us to see Him move in our lives and in the lives of those around us even when by earthly standards the situation seems hopeless.

By exercising our faith, we allow God to be God in our lives, in all that that entails.  We allow Him to use us to bless others.  We allow Him to use others to bless us.  These things are not possible without faith.  That is not to imply that unless we believe God is handcuffed.  Much to the contrary.  But it does prevent His blessings and provision from being manifest in our lives.  And it hinders the fruition of the amazing plans He has in mind for each of us.

Believe in the Lord.  Have faith in Him.  And watch how He will work.


For more Ponderings, click here

Bittersweet

In Alone, Choices, Twins on January 15, 2008 at 11:39 am

November 17th was another bittersweet day.

Sweet for I spent the entire day with my twin sons watching them  perform their musical selections, enjoying their carefree way of interacting with their friends, realizing just how much they are respected and admired by all who know them and just hanging out with two of the best sons a father could ever have.

Bitter because they left.  I knew early this morning that it would happen later in the day but the time in between allowed me to push the pain of that moment away until the last moment.  As we ate Dominoes Pizza and Subway sandwiches together; as the Frisbee was thrown and the balls dodged; as the laughs came quickly and easily the pain of knowing that they would soon get on the bus and return to their real home was masked.

But then the moment came and as Daniel walked me to my car and I pulled away from my precious children, the reality of all I had lost – all that I had so foolishly thrown away – rushed back upon my heart with tsunami strength.  As I drove back to my rental house with no heat or hot water and so few pieces of furniture, I once again kicked myself for the poor decisions and the mistakes of the past.

Dan Fogelburg wrote a song with the poignant lyric, “The nectar you remember but will never taste again.”  The nectar in this case is the knowing that my children will always think of my home as home.  I remember how that felt and I will never know it again.  The price of my sin is almost more than I can bear!

Handling The Blessings Of God

In Blessings, Choices, Devotions, Genesis on January 5, 2008 at 6:26 pm

I will make of you a great nation, and I will bless you, and make your name great, so that you will be a blessing. Genesis 12:2

What a promise!  A three-fold promise to the aging man.  A great nation.  Blessings.  Fame.  What a deal.  Where do I sign up?

But before we all pile into the line that is now forming, be sure to notice the requirement at the end of the verse.  How are we to handle the blessings of God?  Are we to hoard them, wallowing in the God-given gifts or are we to pay them forward and use those gifts to bless others?

Well, given those two choices, it’s obvious, isn’t it?

One other thing, though, I want you to realize here.  For those of us past the 40 mark in our lives, it is easy to believe that we are past our prime, over the hill, ready to be put out to pasture, or some other euphemism signing a general uselessness.  Don’t subscribe to that.  That is a whisper – or possibly a shout – from the devil. 

Consider Abram.  At the ripe old age of 75 he started his journey.  At the advanced age of seven score and five, he receives the Word from the Lord that he – Abram – will become a great nation.  At three-quarters of a century, Sarai’s husband is told to expect an heir.

We are never too old to obey God or experience His blessings on our life.  Look for it.  Listen for it.  Expect it.  You’ll know when God’s finished with you.  You’ll be in heaven.


For more Ponderings, click here.

Confusion

In Choices, Confusion, Control, Devotions, Doubt, Genesis, Perseverance on January 4, 2008 at 4:40 pm

Therefore it was called Babel, because there the LORD confused the language of all the earth; and from there the LORD scattered them abroad over the face of all the earth. Genesis 11:9
Terah took his son Abram and his grandson Lot son of Haran, and his daughter-in-law Sarai, his son Abram’s wife, and they went out together from Ur of the Chaldeans to go into the land of Canaan; but when they came to Haran, they settled there. Genesis 11:31

Is there still any doubt about God being in control? 

If there is, the story of the Tower of Babel should dispose of it.  Man can make his plans, dream his grand dreams and bask in his illusions of grandeur, but at the end of the day, God has the final say.

We start out on many journeys throughout life.  Careers, marriages, missions and purposes.  Yet so many times we fail to persevere and see our dreams realized.  The family of Abram set out for Canaan, but somehow became distracted along the way so “they settled”.  Sadder words were never penned.  How many times have I been in the midst of a good thing only to become distracted?  How many times have I settled for less than my dream or forfeited a goal in exchange for the substandard?  Less than God’s plan.  Less than my potential.  Less!! 

Well, I’m through with less.  I want more.  I want far beyond anything I could ever ask of even think.  I want abundance and fullness and richness of life here and eternity in heaven with Jesus.

Is that asking too much?  I don’t think so.  Neither does God!


For more Ponderings, click here.

Good or Best?

In Choices, Devotions, Generosity, Genesis, God's Love, God's Provision on January 2, 2008 at 11:32 am

“…and Abel for his part brought of the firstlings of his flock, their fat portions. And the LORD had regard for Abel and his offering,…”  Genesis 4:4

One brother brought a gift from his excess.  One brought a gift of his best. 

Reminds me of a credit card statement.  These things come in every month and offer a choice.  I can choose to pay the minimum payment and live under the rule of debt or I can sacrifice and give from the deeper pocket and strip that burden from my life.

Through this time I have reaped the benefits of a lifetime of choosing not to deal with the minimums when dealing with God.  Even though I fell away from Him and chose the wrong life path for a while, He has protected and provided even here. 

Give of your best to the Master.  You’ll never be sorry you did for you will surely pass through the deep waters at various stages of life and you will need His protection and provision, regardless of how self-reliant you may feel at the moment.

Deep waters….I’ve been through some pretty impressive floods these past years.  And He has been true to His Word: my troubles have not overwhelmed me.  By and through Him, I will overcome this thing, living under His control, in His plan and because of His forgiveness and gracious forgetfulness.

He didn’t wait with crossed arms and a scowl on His face.  Mercy came running to this prodigal.  The prisoner of sin has been set free!


For more Ponderings, click here.

God Is In Control

In Choices, Devotions, Genesis, God's Love on January 1, 2008 at 1:28 pm

And God said, “Let there be lights in the dome of the sky to separate the day from the night; and let them be for signs and for seasons and for days and years, and let them be lights in the dome of the sky to give light upon the earth.” And it was so.  And God saw that it was good.  Gen. 1:14-15, 18b

In the beginning God was in control.  Complete control.  He set the world on its axis and spun it by willing it to happen.  All creation was under His control and everything still is. 

But the ultimate evidence of the extent and completeness of His control came from His relinquishment of that control to His creation.  He created the Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil and set in down in the middle of His garden.  And He considered it a good thing. 

And by this act of His will He gave us a choice.  He gave us the ability to embrace and accept Him or to shun and ignore Him. 

As the new year starts and the unmarred days of a fresh year unfurl before us, what choice will we make?  Remember Who is in control.  We may have the choice but the end of the story has already been written.  It was written before the first created thing was spoken into existence.  We already know Who wins. 

So choose wisely.


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Standing on the Threshold

In Choices, Devotions, New Year, Revelation on January 1, 2008 at 12:33 pm
 “He will wipe every tear from their eyes. Death will be no more; mourning and crying and pain will be no more, for the first things have passed away.”  And the one who was seated on the throne said, “See, I am making all things new.” Also he said, “Write this, for these words are trustworthy and true.”  Revelation 21:4-5 

Today we stand on a threshold.  The entire world stands on the threshold of a new year.  With one hand we close the book of 2007.  With our hindsight we retrace the paths we’ve walked, the decisions we’ve made, the words spoken and deeds done.  And with that perfect vision we analyze.  We see the joys we’ve brought and the wounds inflicted.  We see our triumphs and our mistakes.  Our successes and our failures.  We can see how we’ve pleased God and felt His presence and felt His leading or how we’ve failed Him and suffered His punishment and endured the loneliness of the separation from our Creator.

All of this flashes past as we shut that old book.  But even as we close one, we reach to open the new.  By the millions this night will be spent in celebration of a new year – a celebration of a new beginning.  A celebration of the unknown.  And millions will wake up tomorrow morning with aching heads and blurred memories of tonight only to begin another year like they began the last.

But it doesn’t have to be that way.  While our foresight can never be as our hindsight, we can rejoice because we know the end of the story.  God wins and if we are aligned with Him and if we are on His side – we are victors before the race called 2008 even begins.


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